Prankster and Soldier
by FishyFloat
Summary: Nosedive and Mallory have a secret that they're trying to keep from the rest of the team. April- A wedding announcement for Nosedive and Mallory appears on the cover of the newspaper. Have they tied the knot so soon?
1. The Secret

**AN:** BraveKid very, very badly wants to see a Nosedive/Mallory romance and I've decided to give it to him. This story absolutely does fit in with my timeline and previous stories, so it might help if you've at least read Night Terrors, Welcome to Earth (chapter 3, A Tour of the Pond), and Snow Skip. If you're not a Nosedive/Mallory shipper, please don't disregard this story and move on; you might change your mind by the end! For those of you who do enjoy a bit of Dive/Mal romance, I hope you're not too disappointed with the way I handle things.

This particular story is completely written and waiting to be uploaded. Updates will occur once a week on Tuesdays. I'm doing something a little experimental with this tale... The story is taking place in real time. Today is March 4th both now and in the story. Each update will take place in real time, so do pay attention to dates.

Now, on to the shortest chapter! Don't worry, the next one is quite a bit longer ;)

* * *

**Date: March 4, 1997**

"Come on, Mallory. Please?" Nosedive's pleading tone was accompanied by the most pitiful, sad eyes he could muster.

Mallory had seen less pathetic puppies begging for food. He may be young, but he certainly knew exactly how to manipulate her when the need arose. And, he had caught her in one of the few parts of their base they could almost be assured of privacy: the armory. That was her domain and few other than Wildwing dared enter without her prior approval. The fact that he had come in here just proved how desperate he really was. Everyone knew better than to risk setting off her temper when weapons were around, not that her fists and words couldn't inflict plenty of damage when she was riled.

"Fine," she sighed, arms crossed. "But we have to be careful. You're still a minor. We really don't need the press to get a hold of this. Can you imagine the publicity mess we'd have to clean up?"

"So? My birthday's next week. And it's not like seventeen is a minor on Puckworld."

"So, I don't want to be accused of going after the team captain's younger brother when he's still illegal according to human laws! We'll keep it a secret until after your birthday."

He paused for a moment, considering how long they had been on the planet, how long he'd known Mallory, and the short amount of time between now and his birthday. Five days really wasn't that long to wait. He could be patient when the need called for it. This whole thing with Mallory was certainly worth the short delay. It didn't cost him anything to bend to her wishes this time and it might actually gain him a whole lot.

"Okay," he agreed.

"Are you sure you can keep this from Wildwing?" Her eyes narrowed as she studied him, clearly doubting his ability to hide anything from his brother.

"Tchyeah! No problemo." He grinned evilly. "He still doesn't know how his favorite jersey ended up neon pink when he was nine. If I can keep that secret for eleven years, I think I can keep this one for a few more days."

"I don't know… Even if you can keep quiet, I don't like hiding things from him. He is team captain and secrets like this can tear a team apart."

"I promise, I'll tell him when the time is right."

"Okay," she nodded, apparently satisfied that this could actually work. "But, I have a few conditions of my own."

"Name them." Mallory had finally agreed; he was willing to meet just about any condition she could come up with. No pranks for a month? Sure! Clean her gear? If she'd let him actually touch it, no problem. Cook dinner on her nights for the rest of the year? Absolutely! In fact, that would probably be doing the whole team a favor.

She held up a finger with each requirement, emphasizing exactly what she wanted.

"It's real, it's big, and I get to keep it."

Ouch. Yeah, he hadn't really thought about it that far in advance. Still, he had money to spare. There were worse things he could spend it on than gifts for the most beautiful duck on the planet.

"Deal." He grinned deviously as he spread his arms wide. "Hug on it?"

"Hah!" She couldn't help but laugh at him and that earnest expression on his face. "Why not?"

They were both smiling when they finally broke apart from the embrace.

"I'll, uh," he cleared his throat. "I'll see you later, then."

"Sure." She turned her attention back to cleaning the dismantled puck blaster laid out on the table next to her.

The quick glance and charming smile he threw back at her as he exited caused him to miss the doorway by a few inches. He walked straight into the door frame. Laughing nervously, he quickly took a step to the right and hurried out.

Chuckling quietly to herself, she couldn't help but think over the strange conversation they'd just had. That smile on Nosedive's face when he left was so cute, not to mention the whole idea he had proposed. Truthfully, she was amazed that his cheerfulness and joking had survived the slave camps. That bright nature was the one thing that had kept her from killing him herself on numerous occasions, not that she'd admit it to him or anyone else. It was what made him such a great asset to the team, even if he could be a little annoying at times.

It was nice to be on his side. Who knew? If this whole thing worked out, they'd most likely be partners in the future.


	2. The Birthday

**AN:** Welcome to the next installment of Prankster and Solider! See? I promised you this would be so much longer than the last chapter. Hard to believe, but this chapter is over 10,000 words. And here I thought 22K would complete the story… Oh well, more for you to read!

Thank you for the kind reviews. Each one makes me smile for hours after reading it and urges me on to create yet more stories. I hope you enjoy this chapter as much as the last.

Next week: St. Patrick's Day! Ducks gonna par-tay.

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**March 11**

Nosedive tried to ignore the cameras setting up to record their morning practice. He'd known that Phil was going to make a big deal out of his birthday, but had hoped for at least a little privacy. Sadly, it looked like he was going to be denied that. He knew those vultures were waiting just outside their locker room, ready to ambush them with cameras and record them as they walked down the hallway to the ice. He started laughing as an idea occurred to him.

"Hey, guys. Want to pretend we're walking in slow motion to the rink while those idiots try to record us?" Hah! Perfect! They could go so slowly and drive the cameramen nuts.

"Eh, no." Duke shook his head. "Not gonna happen."

"Hah!" Mallory laughed. "Tanya'd probably trip over her own feet if she tried that."

"I would not!" Tanya stared indignantly at the only other female on the team.

"Tanya," Mallory reminded, "You tripped over a spoon yesterday morning."

"Well, it shouldn't have been on the floor."

"Yeah," Duke agreed. "Why was it there anyway?"

"Because he was throwing it at me," Wildwing reminded as he entered the locker room, a newly cut and taped stick in hand. The white drake was almost ready to hit the ice; all that was missing were his skates and goal pads.

"Hey!" Nosedive complained. "Is that one of mine?"

"It was," Wildwing shrugged as he leaned the stick against his stall and opened the bench to find a helmet. "You hadn't cut it yet; so, technically, it wasn't really yours."

"Great," Nosedive pretended aggravation. "It's my hatching day and you're stealing my equipment. Come on, bro! Don't you know you're supposed to give me things today?"

"Careful," Mallory warned. "You're beginning to sound like Phil."

"Don't worry," Wildwing promised with a knowing smile. "I will."

Nosedive stared at his brother in confusion as they exited the locker room. The team captain hadn't put on his goalie gear at all; instead, he was dressed like the rest of them. A white helmet sat atop his head rather than the Mask of Drake DuCaine and he carried a regular stick instead of his goal stick.

"Not guarding the crease today?" He held the door open for everyone as they exited the locker room and walked down the concrete hallway to the rink.

"Nope!" Wildwing put one arm around his brother's shoulders and gave him a quick hug, ignoring the small camera crew following them. "We're actually going to have a three on three game."

"Cool!" The youth's eyes lit up at the thought. They hadn't managed an all duck three on three since Puckworld. Practices were usually unevenly matched unless someone sat out and Wildwing would play goalie for both sides. In fact, now that he thought about it, Nosedive hadn't seen Wildwing play any other position since they'd come to Earth. Back home, he'd occasionally pick up left wing or defense if needed; but, even then, it was rare to see him without the large, white goal pads or a mask hiding his face. "I guess we'll have an empty net today, huh?"

"Not exactly. There's a Wild Wing in the crease, but it's not me."

As they exited the tunnel, Nosedive saw exactly what his brother was talking about. Wild Wing, their team mascot, stood at center ice, completely decked out in real goalie gear instead of the lighter, fabric pads normally used for public appearances. He held a large sign that read "Happy Birthday, Nosedive!" in bold, green lettering with a picture of their logo at the bottom. Signatures from the Power Players, equipment crew, and other arena employees covered the massive card.

"Hah!" Nosedive couldn't help but laugh. His brother had actually managed to create an all duck game, even if one of them was in costume. "Hey, Daffy!" He skated out and gave the mascot a high five.

The costumed Wild Wing handed over the sign and opened his arms wide, silently asking for a hug. Laughing, Nosedive obliged.

"Come on, now," Wildwing grabbed his brother and pulled him away, glaring at the costumed duck. "He's my brother, not yours."

Feigning disappointment, Wild Wing turned his back and slowly skated towards the crease. After a moment, he glanced over his shoulder and saw the Flashblades were completely ignoring him. Seizing the opportunity, he sped towards the player bench where they were dropping off the oversized birthday card and pounced, giving them both a big hug.

"Gah! Daffy!" Wildwing laughed and pushed his semi-twin away. "You'd better get in that crease before I send you to the penalty box." His words were admonishing, but the tone was light, playful.

Wild Wing obeyed and slowly skated away, head hanging, and pretended to wipe away a tear. Glancing back at the brothers, he hoped for an apology. Receiving nothing other than an emphatic finger pointing to the goal crease, he continued to make his way to the net. Once there, he retrieved his goal stick from the netting on top. Tapping the posts to either side with his stick, he proudly stood tall, guarding the goal.

"How we gonna split up?" Duke asked his captain after testing the lid on his water bottle to make sure it hadn't been tampered with. He knew Nosedive wouldn't be able to resist a few pranks today. Crazy kid probably figured he'd be able to get away with anything and Duke wasn't about to take any chances.

"I figured we'd let Nosedive choose his team." Wildwing shrugged and adjusted his helmet, settling the visor more comfortably into place. He was used to wearing the mask, not having a visor partially digging into his beak. He'd have to remember to sand down the plexiglas more after practice today. Even if he didn't use this helmet very often, it was always a good idea to have it as a backup.

"Bubalas!" Phil's overly cheerful voice floated through the chilled air, adding a touch of annoyance to the lighthearted day.

"Great," Nosedive rolled his eyes. "He'd better have brought jelly donuts."

"Fat chance!" Mallory laughed. "He probably ate it on the way here if he did."

"No," Tanya reminded. "He knows better than that." Her wicked smile at the retribution she'd extracted upon Phil the one time he'd actually bought donuts for the team and hoarded the jelly filled delicacy without allowing them the proper battle for it proved she was willing to re-rig his car to backfire every half mile. Then again, she had just finished a program to call his beeper every thirty seconds. That might be a more fitting punishment this time around.

Grin eagerly returned to the tunnel where Phil stood, clearly hoping to be the first to go through the hoped for box of pastries.

A small camera crew of three stood next to Phil. Their favorite reporter, Cody Pope, tried to hide behind Phil at the giant's approach. Cody, a baby-faced, middle aged man with a barely disguised receding hairline, was their favorite not because of his likability or politeness, but because he was so easy to pick on. The good natured joking between team and media had become something of a legend amongst other newscasters.

"Morning," Cody greeted from behind the much burlier manager. He wasn't above using Phil as a human shield in case the ducks sent a shower of ice over the arena boards.

Duke looked them over and was disappointed to find a distinct lack of white boxes from the Happy Buccaneer Bakery.

Deeming it safe for the time being, the suited newscaster stepped forward and smiled at his local team.

"Happy birthday, Nosedive." He cheerfully held up a portable microphone pack. "Let's get you wired up so we can get this practice taped."

"Aw, man," Nosedive complained. "You're going to record me?"

"Better keep it clean, kid," Duke laughed.

"Yeah," Mallory agreed. "No cussing."

"Like I'd do that." Nosedive pretended offense. Spreading his arms wide, he allowed Cody to attach the small black box to the back of his uniform and guide the minuscule mic to the front of his jersey.

"We all ready now?" Wildwing asked, eager to get this practice underway. At the nod and thumbs up from the camera crew, he turned to his brother. "Okay, Dive. Pick your team."

"Aw, that's easy. You and Grin. I'm center!"

"Sounds like a good split to me," Duke grinned. "I get the good lookin' ones." He tried putting his arms around Mallory's and Tanya's shoulders, only to end up sitting on the ice hard as Mallory easily dodged and tripped him. "Fine. You take center," he called out to the redhead as Tanya helped him up. "You got right?"

"Yeah," Tanya nodded. "That works for me."

"Pfft," Mallory rolled her eyes. "You just want to stare at my ass."

"Don't need ya at center to do that, sweetheart." He shifted his grip on his stick to a left handed one, thankful for the years of sword practice with his off-hand. While not naturally ambidextrous, he was nearly so from sheer force of will.

"Phil," Wildwing called out as he held up a puck. "Want to handle the drop?"

"Glad to." The large manager shifted his prodigious girth out onto the ice and took the black disk from the team captain. When Mallory and Nosedive placed their sticks on either side of the red circle designating center ice, he dropped the puck between them and quickly backed up to avoid the swiftly moving sticks as they fought for possession.

Mallory won the face off, pushing the puck between her legs and back to Duke. He easily caught the speedily moving disk, tilting his stick to cup it close to the ice and protecting it from Wildwing's attempts at stealing it. The gray drake passed to Tanya just as Grin tried for an open ice check.

Missing the agile thief by mere inches, Grin quickly turned around and gave chase, intent on stealing from the master. Every attempt he made at taking out the other gray drake was easily avoided with a skillful dodge, spin, or unpredictable change of direction. This was a game they often played; it helped Duke stay aware of players approaching from his right and aided Grin in fine tuning his agility and speed.

"I don't think so, Grin!" Mallory taunted as she braced herself right in front of him, driving her shoulder into his ribs and halting his attack on Duke. She smiled down at the largest team member for a moment as he fell to the ice before speeding off to accept a pass from Tanya. Unfortunately for her, Nosedive had noticed their subtle signaling and sped in to snatch the puck before it could reach Mallory's stick.

"That's mine, girly-girl!" Maneuvering the puck to his left, he held it out of her reach and found a good position to the side of the net. Reflexively, he took a hard wrist shot, sending it flying towards the costumed duck.

Despite the handicap of impaired vision from the costume, Wild Wing jumped in front of the rocketing disk and stopped it with his shoulder. The puck bounced off, landing several inches from his feet.

Wildwing picked up the rebound and backhanded it right between the mascot's legs before he could block.

"Gotta work on that butterfly," he lightly teased.

"All right!" Nosedive cheered. "Right through the five-hole!" Raising his hand, he gave both Wildwing and Grin a high five.

"Eh, don't get cocky kid," Duke warned. "We were going easy on ya."

"Bring it, old man," Nosedive taunted.

"Mal, you take left? I think I need to give a lesson in manners." Stretching upright, he glared down at Nosedive, pretending offense at the crack about his age. He could only maintain the glare for a short time before Nosedive's cocky grin and complete indifference to the intimidation made him laugh.

"Oh, I think I can teach him some manners." Grinning wickedly at Nosedive, she eagerly pushed Duke aside. "Get back there and keep your eyes off my rear."

"Ooh!" Nosedive brightened and looked at the camera crew standing on the other side of the boards. "Hey, Cody!" Waving his arm, he beckoned the reporter onto the ice.

Wide eyed, the human shook his head no.

"Come on," Nosedive begged. "You can be our official ref for practice!"

"Thank you, but no," he called out, unwilling to risk the dangers of pranking ducks.

Mallory skated over to the camera crew and leaned on the barrier, giving them her most charming smile.

"Please?" She batted her eyes at Cody, totally overdoing the whole flirting thing. "I promise not to let Nosedive check you."

Charging at the barrier with a reckless speed, Nosedive quickly stopped and leaned next to Mallory, imitating her actions.

"And I promise to keep Mallory from punching you!" He too batted his eyes at the reporter.

"Ah, what the heck?" Duke left his spot by the center face off circle and joined his teammates on the boards. Resting his forearms on the red topped barrier, he added a winning smile and cheerful expression into the mix. "I promise to give ya your watch back."

"Dude," Nosedive half snorted, half laughed. "I can't tell if you're winking at him or just blinking."

Mallory leaned back and looked at Duke over Nosedive's head. "You wanna do it or should I?"

"Eh, you can. I'll get 'im later."

"Ow, hey!" Nosedive complained as Mallory pulled his leg out from under him, sending the youth crashing to the ice rather ungracefully.

"Thank you, but no," Cody refused yet again.

"Suit yourself," Duke shrugged. Removing his glove, he admired the new timepiece on his wrist. "This watch ought ta look real nice in my collection. Might even wear it to a game or two."

Frowning, the baby-faced reporter checked his own wrist. Sure enough, the watch was gone. Sighing in aggravation, he handed his microphone to the sound man and carefully stepped onto the slippery surface.

"All right!" Nosedive cheered. "Cody Pope is on da ice." Bouncing around to non-existent music, he tried pulling the human into a dance.

"Hey!" Cody pulled away and stood in front of Duke, hand out for his stolen watch.

"Might wanna get a better band for that thing," Duke teased as he handed it over. "Be a shame for a watch that nice to get lost."

Sighing heavily, Cody ignored Duke and reattached the Rolex to his wrist.

"Don't let them get to you," Wildwing reminded as he glided over. "I'm hoping at least one of them will start acting their age by the end of the day."

"Not me!" Nosedive cheered.

"Ey, you're supposed ta be an adult now," Duke called out to the retreating youth. "So start acting like one!"

"You're not setting much of an example for him," Tanya scoffed.

"Age is but a state of mind," Grin nonchalantly commented.

"Come on, team," Wildwing spoke loudly to get everyone's attention. "Let's get back to practice. The sooner we finish this up, the sooner we can have some cake." He gave the sole human on the ice a reassuring smile as he dropped the frozen puck into Cody's waiting hand. "Thanks for being our practice ref. We'll try not to be too rough on you."

"That's what I'm afraid of," Cody muttered. He really should have brought ice skates, or at least worn tennis shoes. Loafers simply were not appropriate footwear for a hockey rink. Still, he knew how unusual it was for the ducks to invite anyone out onto the ice with them. If nothing else, them picking on him would make for good footage and an interesting sequence on Sports Talk tonight.

Nosedive and Mallory once more took their positions on either side of the center face off circle. Meeting Mallory's intense gaze, Nosedive winked at her and gave a slight nod towards Cody. Fighting to keep his laughter at bay, he widened his stance and prepared to fight for possession of the puck the moment it was dropped.

Mallory was having the same problem. Her beak was pressed firmly shut, but a small giggle escaped anyway. Gripping her stick tighter, she too was eager for the drop.

Cody held the puck as far away from his body as possible, ready to jump away from the dueling ducks the moment he let go of the black disk. Deciding he didn't want to be in a potentially harmful position any longer than necessary, he threw the puck down and backed off quickly, falling to his rear in the process.

"You take it," Mallory politely offered, straightening up. "It's your hatching day."

"No, you can have it," Nosedive refused. "Ladies first." He backed away, refusing to even touch the vulcanized rubber.

"No, I insist," Mallory remained adamant. "You really should have it."

"I couldn't possibly."

Cody stared at them in amazement. Every single time he'd seen a face off, the ducks had moved lightning fast for possession. Now, they were just standing around, arguing over who should take it!

"Uh-oh!" Mallory exclaimed with exaggerated shock as she noticed their downed ref. "Look what we did. How silly of us." Bending down, she grabbed one of his arms to help him up.

"Here, let me help." Nosedive grabbed the other arm and they lifted the human to his feet. "I guess we'll just have to try this face off again," the blond joked as he brushed ice shavings off Cody's back and rear. Tapping the edge of the puck with his stick, he bounced it into the air and caught it on the blade. "Here ya go, buddy!" Holding out the carefully balanced puck-on-a-stick to the reporter, he smiled broadly. "Maybe the next face off will work out."

Wildwing stood back and watched the whole thing with amusement. He'd never expected to see Nosedive and Mallory being so polite to each other. Something had to be up. The problem was, he had no idea what it could be. Better to stay aware of his surroundings and any potential hazards than fall prey to his brother's latest prank.

A sharp whistle from the goal drew his attention away from the politely arguing ducks. Glancing over his shoulder, he saw Wild Wing beckoning him over. Curious as to what the mascot would want, he abandoned the practice to investigate. Hopefully, Daphne wasn't in on whatever Nosedive was working on…

"What's up?" he asked as he neared his non-twin.

"It's this stupid head." The young woman's voice from inside the costume was muffled and hollow. "I couldn't even see where the puck was the first time I stopped it. If you guys want a goalie, I should get this thing off and use a real mask."

"I thought you didn't want anyone to know who you were?" Daphne had filled him in on some of the rules for mascots when she'd started the job. The first rule was to never speak when in costume; she did on occasion, but only where people who knew who she was could hear her. The second was to never remove the costume's head while on a job.

"I added a tinted visor to my mask. If you guys block the view from the cameras, I can switch and they won't see anything."

"Hm." Glancing over his shoulder, he saw Mallory and Nosedive still fussing over Cody. This wasn't much of a practice, especially if the goalie couldn't see. In fact, it was really more show than anything. As much as he hated Phil's demands for positive publicity, this one actually wasn't bad. "Can you handle it for another ten minutes? The camera crew should have enough footage by then and we can send them to the player lounge to set up."

"Sure," she sighed. "As long as I get to bring in the cake."

"You can bring in the first one," he agreed. "Want to fight over it?"

"Maybe." She sounded thoughtful, but it was hard to tell exactly what was going on behind that gargantuan, immobile face. "How about I start bringing in the cake and you get up and try to take it from me. I'll push you away, trip, and throw it on Nosedive."

"Nah," he shook his head. "I want to push his face in it."

"Then we carry it in together? Ooh!" Using exaggerated movements, she carefully stroked the bottom of the costume beak in thought. "We'll fight over Nosedive again as we leave for the locker room. When we go to the player lounge, you and I can make up. I'll ask for peace." Pointing at herself and then Wildwing, she then held up the peace sign and offered a handshake. "We'll shake hands, turn it into a bear hug, and go get the cake together."

"And after he removes the candles, I'll shove his face in it," Wildwing nodded. "Sounds like a good plan. You still want me to send the camera crew ahead? They won't get the fight on the way to the locker room if I do."

"I didn't think about that. Um…" Giving a huge shrug, she relented. "I'll just deal with it for the rest of practice. Can you guys maybe aim for me and at least make it look like I'm a halfway decent goalie?"

"We'll try, but I'm not making any promises for Mallory."

"Yo, Wing!" Nosedive interrupted them. "Stop flirting with Daffy and get your tailfeathers over here! We going to practice or not?"

At Nosedive's comment, Wild Wing put an arm around Wildwing and carefully considered the alien duck. Pointing to Wildwing and then himself, the mascot quickly backed away, shaking his head emphatically and holding his hands up in revulsion.

"No way," Wildwing agreed.

"That'd be taking narcissism to a new level," Tanya laughed. "Flirting with yourself!"

"Wild Wing is not me," Wildwing once again reminded as he took his place to Nosedive's left. "Different duck entirely."

"I'll believe that when Nosedive marries Mallory," Duke laughed.

"Uh…" Nosedive suddenly looked panicked. "Why would you say that? Me and Mallory? That's ridiculous!" His words poured out far too quickly as he staunchly refused the possibility.

"Like I'd go out with that clown," Mallory lightly laughed, nonchalantly digging an elbow into his ribs. "Shut up," she hissed quietly. "You're going to blow it."

"Okay," Wildwing broke in. "Let's get serious. Cody? Want to try this again?"

"Why not?" the human shrugged. If nothing else, the ducks were being extremely entertaining today. He could hardly wait to get back to the studio and start editing this footage together.

The rest of practice continued in the same lighthearted spirit. Despite being the same length as usual, the hour and a half session flew by for everyone involved.

0000

Raucous laughter echoed throughout the player lounge as Nosedive pulled his head out of the cake. Wiping frosting away from his eyes, Nosedive tried to glare at his brother. A mixture of purple, green, and white frosting swirled around his face and beak turned the annoyed expression comical. Sliding a finger across the bridge of his beak, Nosedive tasted the frosting.

"Mmmm… Cream cheese. Not bad." Grinning deviously, he grabbed a handful of the now destroyed birthday cake and shoved it into Wildwing's hair.

"Gah!" Pulling away, Wildwing tried to avoid the mess and failed miserably. "I really hope this doesn't stain feathers," he muttered, trying to remove the sticky frosting.

"Should have thought of that before shoving his face in it," Mallory taunted, barely controlling her own laughter.

"Here." Duke tossed napkins at the cake covered avians. "I don't know how you two haven't killed each other yet."

"What?" Wildwing scoffed. "And let him get off that easy? If I have to suffer dealing with him, he's stuck with me."

"I'd never kill my big bro," Nosedive laughed, putting an arm around Wildwing's shoulder. "He's my favorite test dummy!"

"Thought that was me," Mallory teasingly poked Nosedive in the arm. "Guess the party's over."

"No," Wildwing left the table in favor of the sink in the corner. "There's another cake in the fridge." Sticking his head under the faucet, he did his best to rid his feathers of the colorful confection. Satisfied that he'd done the best he could without a mirror, he dried off with some paper towels and ran a hand through his hair in an attempt to make it behave.

Tanya removed the smashed cake while Wildwing retrieved the replacement from the refrigerator.

"Nice to see you thinking ahead," Duke nodded slightly. "I'd hate to think Nosedive was the only one to get any of that."

"You want a piece of this?" Nosedive grinned devilishly.

"No," Wildwing grabbed Nosedive's wrist before more cake could be thrown. "Kari only made two."

"Fine." Rolling his eyes, the youth relented and cut the cake.

"What'd you wish for?" Duke asked, shoveling a massive bite of the chocolate cake into his mouth.

"Oh, you know, the usual. Fame, fortune, and girls," Nosedive laughed.

"You've already got the first two," Tanya observed.

"And no hope of the last," Wildwing joked.

"Eh, I dunno." Duke didn't like the frown Nosedive quickly hid at that comment. "Lucretia DeCoy did a pretty good job of chasing you."

"Yeah," Nosedive smiled again. "If a babe like that was after me here, girls will be all over me when we get back to Puckworld!"

"Are you insane?" Mallory scoffed as she slapped Nosedive upside the head. "She was a traitor! And the only reason she was interested in _either _of you was because she was trying to kill us all!"

"Like I said," Nosedive spoke around a mouthful of ice cream and cake, "I ain't picky."

"Well, you'd better start getting picky," Mallory scowled. Getting up, she threw away her half eaten food and left the room.

Frowning, Wildwing watched her leave. What had her so ruffled? Lucretia had become something of a joke to the team. He could think of any number of times that Mallory would join in on teasing Duke and Nosedive for how idiotic they'd acted around her. Maybe she just didn't get enough sleep last night or she could be sore about her team loosing the scrimmage match in practice today. Mallory _hated_ loosing.

"Dang," Duke whistled. "I ain't going anywhere near that til she calms down."

"Can't blame you there," Tanya agreed.

Grin studied Nosedive carefully, curious about the subtle changes in his aura. Nosedive had always been energetic and spontaneous, but now he was seeing traces of something else and he wasn't sure what it was. This would require some meditation before he fully understood.

"What are your plans for the rest of the day?" Phil tried to be nonchalant about the question as he took a third piece of cake.

"Dunno," Nosedive shrugged. "Wing said he's got something planned, but he won't tell me what's up."

"And you're not going to find out until I'm ready to show you," the white drake promised. "We don't need another bunch of cameras and reporters following us around. Practice was bad enough."

"What do you mean, just practice?" Duke snorted, jerking his head towards where they were being quietly filmed.

Grin's expression never changed from one of calm interest as he shifted his chair and blocked the shot. Being the largest duck had its advantages.

Tanya hid her smile behind a cup of water when she realized what he had done.

"Hey," Wildwing motioned towards the extra cake. "Why don't you take some over to them, baby brother?"

"Wing, come on," Nosedive reminded. "I'm eighteen now! Can you please drop the baby brother thing?"

"Never."

"You two are disgusting," Duke chuckled.

"Go on," Wildwing urged, lightly pushing his sibling's shoulder. "I'm sure Cody's hungry after practice."

"Ahhh, I get it." He nodded confidently. Carefully balancing one plate on his forearm while holding the other two in each hand, he carried the sugary goodness over to their everpresent tormentors. "Who wants some cake?"

"Sure," the sound technician accepted eagerly. That cake had looked delicious and he'd been hoping they would share. "Thank you."

"You?" Nosedive held out one of the plates to the camera, making sure to put the purple icing covered confection right in front of the lens. "It's really, really good. Death by German Forest Double Chocolate Cake, one of Kari's specialties."

"Later," the cameraman refused. Honestly, couldn't this duck see that his hands were more than full with the camera and maintaining his shot? They had absolutely no sense of where to stand or give him space and he constantly had to move in order to keep them in frame.

"Cody?" Smiling, he pulled the paper plate back and up, threatening to throw it at the human.

"Oh, please, no." Arms covering his head, he tried to protect himself from the impending onslaught.

"What?" Nosedive scoffed. "This piece is for Daffy. Here's yours." Bending down, he held it under the cringing human's nose.

Realizing he wasn't going to be the third cake-in-the-face victim, Cody straightened and accepted the dessert with a polite thank you.

"No prob." Leaving the other piece sitting on the end table near the cameraman, he returned to the large, granite topped table the rest of the team and Phil sat around. "Anyone seen Daffy?"

"Not since the photos." Wildwing glanced towards the doorway, wondering where their mascot had wandered off to. Daphne had probably been overheating in the costume again and needed a break. He had no idea how someone could stand to be inside that thing, especially after he'd learned that temperatures inside the suit could easily reach excess of a hundred degrees.

"Probably cooling off," Tanya echoed her leader's thoughts. "I really should finish that cooling suit I've been working on." The last part was said mostly to herself as she mentally filed away the note. It was yet another of many unfinished projects, resting in pieces, scattered about her lab.

"Well, I've had enough." Duke stood and threw away his empty plate. "I'm heading out. See you guys later." With that, he headed towards the locker room and escaped the pressures of the media.

"You going to be ready to go in an hour, little brother?" Wildwing asked, purposefully changing the 'baby' part.

"Yeah, I should be. Anything I need to grab?"

"I'll tell you before we go," Wildwing promised as he too stood. "I'm not about to give Phil any hints."

"You're missing out on a golden opportunity," Phil began. "I mean, just picture it. We could do a whole special about how you guys spend your birthdays! I'm sure Cody's crew could follow you around for the rest of the day and record whatever you do."

"No!" Both Wildwing and Nosedive echoed and made good their own escape.

0000

"Hey, Mallory!" Nosedive cheerfully greeted his favorite redhead as they passed each other in the hallway. He was on his way to the hangar to meet Wildwing and go do whatever it was his brother had planned. He hoped his typical torn jeans, t-shirt, and vest from Puckworld would be appropriate. Knowing his sibling, Wildwing would have told him if it wasn't.

"Hey." She sounded apologetic. "Look, I'm sorry about earlier. Just, even thinking about that traitor makes my skin crawl."

"No problem," he shrugged. "Water off my back and all that."

"Um, I was hoping we could get together this afternoon and celebrate," she offered. "Maybe go out for dinner and a movie."

"Aw, man, Mallory. That sounds great, but Wing already has something planned. I'm sorry."

"Fine!" Her temper flared once more. "You know what? I don't care. If this is the way you treat your girlfriend, then you can just forget it."

"Mal, I didn't mean that."

"Screw it. You're an immature little duckling. Go on, go play with your brother." Crossing her arms, she glared at him dangerously. He'd better skate carefully or risk going wherever Wildwing was taking him with a black eye.

"Look, I don't know how long whatever he has planned is going to take. We could still go out. Or we could do it tomorrow." Dealing with her fickle nature and ready temper was not one of Nosedive's favorite things. He wanted nothing more than to just run off and spend the afternoon with Wildwing, but knew that leaving her in this mood wasn't the best idea. If she didn't take it out on him, she certainly would on someone else.

Eyes narrowing, she studied him, angry posture never changing.

"We'll see." With that, she turned on her heel and purposefully walked off, fury radiating in every step.

"Watch out, Duke," Nosedive muttered, feeling sorry for the former thief. For a brief moment, he considered warning the others, but then thought better of it. If Mallory found out, he'd be in even more trouble than he already was.

0000

"What are we doing here?" Sitting on his parked dyckcycle, Nosedive stared at the strip mall in front of him. Orange tiles capped the white, stucco style shop exteriors. His brother had led him to the Yorba Linda Ice Rink, which was extremely strange considering they lived under their own arena and had just spent the morning there. Maybe this was Wildwing's way of getting some quality time on the ice without the hassle of cameras and Phil's shenanigans?

"You'll see," Wildwing smirked. Lifting the seat, he retrieved his skates. Grabbing his stick from the clips he'd used to attach it to the side of the bike, he waved for his sibling to follow.

Shaking his head slightly, Nosedive retrieved his skates and stick as well.

As much as he enjoyed living somewhere with actually nice weather, Nosedive did not like the extreme heat radiating off the blacktop as they walked to the arena. Today had turned out exceptionally hot with a high near eighty-five and the pavement was only amplifying it. The parking lot was packed and the closest space they'd been able to find was all the way at the other end near the gas station, prolonging the trip through the natural oven. Either one of the shops in the strip mall was having a tremendous sale or someone had told their adoring public that the Flashblades would be at the rink.

Wildwing held the door open for Nosedive to grab as he led the way inside. Everything was decorated in grays and blacks. Duke would like it here; it'd be easy for him to blend in and disappear with the color scheme. To their right was a long hallway filled with arcade games, claw machines, two money changers, vending machines, and an air hockey table. As far as arcades went, this one wasn't very interesting; the one at the mall had a much better variety and layout. A sign hanging from the ceiling gave directions to two rinks, a cafe, and training rooms.

"Hello!" a young man behind the standalone ticket counter greeted as the two ducks entered. His black shirt blended in with the display behind him. "They've already started if you want to go ahead and join in."

"Thanks," Wildwing waved as he confidently strode past the counter.

"You're not selling me out on one of Phil's stunts, are you?" Nosedive questioned.

"Nope," Wildwing smiled and put an arm around his younger brother's shoulder. "I came up with something a little different for today, since it's not really your hatching day."

"Oh? What're you doing, going to teach me how to play goalie? Got news for ya, bro. I already know to stay as far away from the net as possible unless I'm the one slinging the puck in there."

"No. Just," he paused a moment, glancing to the far wall before continuing. "Just keeping a promise."

Quirking an eyebrow, Nosedive studied the white drake. What promise had Wildwing made to him that he hadn't already kept?

"Here we go," Wildwing directed as he pushed open the door to the smaller rink.

The white of the ice, white walls, and white, girdered ceiling were almost blinding compared to the dark hallway they'd just left behind. Fifteen or twenty children wearing violet and white jerseys were skating around, trying desperately to hold onto their sticks and stay upright. Two coaches gently gave directions, helping train the potential future hockey players.

"Nosedive, meet Mikayla's Friends." A mixture of pride and sadness hid behind the smile Wildwing gave him as he motioned to the skating children.

"What?" Mikayla's Friends? Was that the team name? It didn't surprise him that Wildwing would name a team after her, but it did seem strange.

"It's a program for first time skaters," the team captain went on to explain as he sat down and started putting on his skates. "We'll provide all the equipment for them to get used to skating in full hockey gear and learn about the game. I've already lined up the coaches, so they're getting a pretty good introduction. They're given a meal after, if they want it. At the end of the four weeks, you and I will donate the gear to any kids who want to join a junior league. If they don't join, we'll reuse the equipment for the next group."

"Whoa." Half smiling, he tightened the laces on his own skates. Yeah, that was totally something Wildwing would do. He was pretty proud of his brother for coming up with something like this to honor Mikayla and making sure to include him. "That's a really cool idea."

Wildwing's words to Mikayla on the night she died floated through Nosedive's mind. _We're going to find a new home soon. One where there aren't any drones and we don't have to work. There's going to be enough to eat and we can play hockey again._ This program was exactly what he had promised.

"So, you ready to be mobbed by the howler monkeys?" Standing, he offered a hand and helped pull Nosedive to his feet.

Laughing at his brother's use of the term Mallory had coined for shrieking, crying, and generally ill-behaved children at their games and public appearances, he happily stepped onto the ice and waited by the gate for the coaches to introduce them.

"Ducks!" One little boy screamed as he broke away from the group and carefully step-skated towards them in the awkward gate of an inexperienced skater. He was probably somewhere around four or five. Despite the smaller sizing, the jersey he wore still came down to his knees.

Chaos erupted as the presence of professional athletes, who also happened to be alien ducks, was announced. All of the kids stopped paying attention to what they were supposed to be doing and started heading for the far more interesting adults. The coaches knew better than to even attempt regaining control until after the Mighty Ducks had been introduced. Once little kids were distracted and fixated on something, that curiosity had to be sated before order could be restored.

Wildwing and Nosedive both left the wall in favor of open ice. Being trapped against the barrier was the last thing either of them wanted, even if moving away from it did mean the kids would literally surround them.

"Wildwing, Nosedive," Coach Saruco greeted as he followed the gaggle of young children. The broad shouldered man paused to help a fallen charge regain his feet. "You're okay, Mattie," he laughed, lightly tapping the white helmet as the little boy scrambled over to the ducks.

"Are you really a duck?" a little girl asked as she tugged on Nosedive's white vest.

Smiling to himself, Nosedive dropped to one knee and met the eager youth at her level.

"I dunno," he joked. "What do I look like?"

"Um…" Her cheek caved inward slightly as she chewed on it and thought. "A duck?"

"Are you going to teach us?" a boy around nine begged. "I wanna know how you hit the pucks through the net!"

"That takes years of practice," Wildwing laughed. "And a goalie smart enough to get out of the way," he said with a wink at his brother.

"All right, kids!" Coach Gabriel clapped her hands loudly to pull their attention away from the ducks. "Let's take a knee and give the ducks some room." She slowly crouched, lowering her hands to the ice before bending one knee and balancing on it. The children followed her example and only three ended up falling over before shifting around to the proper stance.

The two avians followed suit, easily dropping into what was a standard waiting position during practices.

"This is Wildwing and Nosedive Flashblade," Coach Gabriel introduced from her spot next to the ducks. "Does anyone here know what positions they play?"

"The mascot!" an overly assured voice called out.

Nosedive laughed quietly at the groan from Wildwing. As cool as Daphne was, that mascot was nothing but a pain in the tailfeathers for Wildwing.

"No," Wildwing shook his head. "That's Wild Wing." He emphasized the pause between names, hoping to drive the point home. "But we play the same position."

"Center?" the little girl who had previously questioned Nosedive offered hopefully.

"No, dummy," an older boy scolded. "Left wing!"

"Hey," Coach Saruco scolded. "We don't call names. Now, apologize." He nodded approvingly at the mumbled _sorry _and returned his attention to the ducks.

"Nope!" Nosedive laughed. "I'm left wing."

"I'll give you a hint," Coach Gabriel offered. "He wears a mask."

"Goalie!" several voices choired out at once.

"Can we see your mask?" the young girl closest to Wildwing begged.

"Not right now," he refused. "I didn't bring it with me." To everyone's surprise, he'd actually left it at the pond with his armor. He could have it in a matter of seconds if he activated his quick change, but there was no way he was going to do that in front of these children. The few times he'd been around kids while in full battle gear, the large armor and golden mask had terrified them. "But, I promise I'll bring it the next time I come."

"And he always keeps his promises," Nosedive assured them. "How long have you guys been skating?"

"Forever." The word was dragged out, each syllable carefully enunciated to show just how long they'd been on the frozen surface.

"About fifteen minutes," Coach Saruco informed. "This is actually the first time on the ice for all but two of them."

"They're doing great," Coach Gabriel assured. "We've got buckets and cones to help with balance. We were going to work on not using the stick as a tripod in a little bit."

"Sounds good," Wildwing nodded. "Need any help? We're not here just to watch."

"I don't know," Coach Saruco pretended to consider the offer. "What do you think, kids? Do you want the ducks to help?"

The chorus of yes's and cheers that followed was as firm an answer as the ducks could have ever hoped to receive.

0000

"No good, immature, lying, little brat," Mallory muttered insults quietly as she reloaded her puck launcher. "We're supposed to be a team, huh?" She spat the question sarcastically as she slammed the magazine into place. Punching the button that sent her custom made target all the way to the end of the shooting range far more forcefully than needed, she glared at the retreating piece of paper.

Raising the weapon to eye level, she barely thought about aiming before squeezing the trigger in rapid succession. Each loud blast echoed throughout the metal lined room, amplified by the small space. Ejecting the first magazine with a fluid grace, she snagged a second one from her belt and slid it into place. The target, a picture of Nosedive torn from Illustrated Sports, was easily shredded by the second shot. Still, she continued to fire at it as the paper fluttered from its clip and to the floor.

"Supposed to be boyfriend and girlfriend, huh? Ooh-ho-no, I don't think so, Nosedive Flashblade." Her words were soft and carried the threat of death with them.

Skillfully and quickly reloading the two magazines once more, she became consumed in her task. A pile of photographs, newspaper clippings, and magazine articles featuring Nosedive rested on the padded shelf in front of her. Never one to neglect safety, Mallory had donned a pair of red ear muffs and amber-tinted shooting glasses.

Pucklauncher and target clip reloaded, she again unleashed her anger and pucks at the image of her youngest teammate. Insults and threats were spat between rounds with enough venom to kill a cobra. The world knew to hide when Mallory McMallard went beyond yelling and began quietly muttering threats.

It was on her third pause to reload that Tanya walked in. Mallory was so focused her ranting that the technician's approach went completely unnoticed. Wearing professional grade ear protection didn't help with staying aware of what was going on behind her either.

"Um, Mallory?" Tanya nervously tried to get her friend's attention. "You okay?"

"Stupid saurian-loving sycophant."

Tanya nodded in appreciation at Mallory's vernacular. She probably wasn't using sycophant properly, but it was nicely alliterated. Deciding to take the risk, she reached out and lightly touched Mallory's shoulder while the pucklauncher rested on the gray surface and Mallory selected her new target.

Mallory reacted to the touch with a soldier's reflexes. Spinning around, she grabbed the wrist in one hand and flipped Tanya, keeping hold of her arm and placing one boot on her throat before she realized what had happened.

"Oh my goodness," the redhead gasped, quickly letting go and removing her foot. "Tanya, I'm so sorry. Are you okay?"

"Ow," Tanya groaned as she sat up. "That'll teach me to sneak up on you."

"What the hell are you doing here? Didn't you see the sign on the door?"

"Yeah," Tanya nodded as she regained her feet. "You had the occupied sign up. If you didn't want company, you should have added a keep out to it."

Crossing her arms, Mallory met the gaze of the taller duck. She honestly felt bad for attacking her like that, but Tanya really should have known better.

"So, um. What-what're you doing here?" Tanya stammered nervously.

"I could ask you the same thing." She was _not_ in the mood for company and Tanya was the one who had intruded.

Tanya's gaze drifted to the fresh target hanging from the clip and torn images of Nosedive littering the floor.

"I was going to see if you wanted to help with the cooling suit for Daphne since you two are about the same size."

"Not right now." She may have been smiling, but the gesture spoke more of impending mutilation rather than congeniality.

"Um…" Curiosity demanded satisfaction. "What'd Nosedive do this time?" It was his hatching day after all; he'd surely pulled some sort of spectacular prank, especially if Mallory was reacting like this.

Eyes narrowed, the soldier's posture became even more tense. Rather than answer, she hit the button once more and sent the fresh photograph to the furthest end of the range. Lifting the pucklauncher, Mallory took careful aim.

"I suggest you leave before I decide to use a moving target," Mallory ordered. With that, she dismissed Tanya's presence and once more fired at the infuriating picture.

Taking the advice to heart, Tanya quickly exited. She pulled a marker from her breast pocket and scribbled _Do Not Enter: Irate Commando Inside_ on the 'occupied' sign before returning to her lab.

Mallory once again turned her full attention to alleviating her fury. Seven more pictures of Nosedive were destroyed before she paused to check how much ammo she had left. Two boxes were normally enough to work out whatever issues she was dealing with and she'd brought three. Only half of one was left. Deciding to use it all up, she sent a fresh picture out for destruction.

Her anger far outlasted her ammunition.

0000

"Aw man," Nosedive groaned as he slid into the booth at Papa Taco's Cantina. "Why do they always have to go for the beak?" The Mexican restaurant sitting at the opposite end of the strip mall from the ice rink was the perfect place to grab a snack before heading back to the Pond.

Chuckling, Wildwing pushed the menu aside and leaned back. "I don't know, baby brother. Guess they wanted to make sure we're really ducks?"

"Like Nana?" he snorted with laughter. Their first meeting with Phil's grandmother was easily one of the most mortifying moments of Wildwing's life as well as funniest for everyone else. Unaware of what a social taboo it was to touch someone's beak without either being in a very close relationship with them or asking first, Nana had grabbed Wildwing's and given it a very firm tug to make sure he wasn't in costume. The goalie could barely speak to her for days after that without stammering or the feathers around his face fluffing out in embarrassment.

"Please, don't remind me," he groaned. Suddenly, he became very interested in studying the menu he'd previously ignored. "I think I'll just get some queso."

After the waitress appeared to deliver their drinks and take their orders, the brothers continued to relax and reminisce. It wasn't often they had the opportunity to hang out together and not worry about interruptions from teammates, crazy publicity stunts, or predatory photographers.

"Mikayla'd be proud of you, bro," Nosedive smiled wistfully. "Although, I'm sure she could skate circles around those kids today." Unfortunately, they'd never had the chance to play a game of hockey during the short time they'd looked after the young duckling.

"Of course she could," Wildwing snorted. "She was a duck. She'd be pretty proud of you too. If she were here, you'd probably be sporting all sorts of braids."

"Hey, I can pull off the dreadlock look if I want to," Nosedive assured. "Maybe I'll try it."

"I'm not braiding your hair."

"So? I'll get Mallory to do it."

"Haha!" Laughter burst from Wildwing. "She'd be more likely to take a pair of scissors to it."

"Nuh-uh. She likes the long hair," Nosedive assured.

"Sure. That's why she's always getting on your case about looking like an irresponsible hobo."

"At least she doesn't think I'm an albino."

"Hey!" Wildwing stared at him, feigning shock. Deciding to move on from the insult, he changed the subject. "Got any idea what she was so steamed about before we left?"

"Um, not really," he lied. "Does she really need a reason to get ruffled?"

"Maybe we'll get lucky and she'll have insulted Duke before we get back." Removing his arms from the table, Wildwing allowed the waitress to place a large bowl of cheese dip and basket of chips in front of him. Once Nosedive's platter of triple spicy tacos was set down and the waitress had left, he raised his glass of water. "To Duke, Mallory's favorite punching bag."

"Tchya," Nosedive snorted. "It's my hatching day and you're toasting Duke?"

"No it isn't," Wildwing smirked. "And if he keeps Mallory from tearing into anyone else, he deserves it."

Nosedive grabbed his glass of water and raised it. "To a full year of freedom."

"To a full year of freedom," Wildwing heartily agreed.

Nosedive enjoyed the relaxed atmosphere of the restaurant and rare gift of an unplanned day. He'd meant it when he had toasted to freedom. The fifteen months they'd spent in Hyla were the worst of his life. They hadn't been able to go anywhere they weren't force marched to, been crammed into overcrowded, shoddily built bunk houses, and generally treated like trash. Even with the distance of a year to help numb the horror and support of both his brother and Grin, he still relished the little things like going out to a restaurant and ordering whatever he wanted.

"Thinking deep things?" Wildwing questioned softly.

"Want to go swimming?" The question came out before Nosedive even realized he'd been thinking it.

"What?" That certainly wasn't something he'd expected to hear.

"We're not too far from the beach. Or we could go hiking. I dunno, I just feel like going as far as possible today."

"Who says we can't do both?"

"Actually, let's go hiking. That way, we don't have to stop by the pond and get our swim trunks."

"Or we could buy some new ones at one of those shops on the boardwalk." Wildwing offered. It wasn't like they had to penny pinch. Today was too hot and spending it in the shade of a pine forest or still cool ocean sounded heavenly.

"Cool," Nosedive smiled. "Actually, one of the hippie girls who sometimes stops by Captain Comics was telling Thrash and Mookie about this trail at Crystal Cove where you can cliff dive. I bet we can find it."

"Sounds perfect. We'll stop by the grocery on the way there and pick up something for dinner on the beach."

"Coolio." Taking the last bite of his taco, he got up. "I'm gonna hit the restroom before we go."

"I've got the check," Wildwing offered.

"Course you do!" With that, he headed for the back of the restaurant.

Wildwing waved the waitress over and told her about Nosedive's birthday. He knew the moment his brother returned to the table, he was going to be ambushed with singing staff and chocolate sopapillas a la mode with sparklers. The hike could wait a little longer.

0000

"I'm going to be getting sand out of my feathers for a week," Nosedive complained as he and Wildwing stepped from the elevator next to Drake One.

"At least you didn't get sunburned," Wildwing admonished.

Tanya leaned back in her chair and watched the brothers as they drew closer. Both looked like absolute messes. Their hair was going every which way and each carried a plastic bag from California Coastal Wear in addition to their hockey sticks, skates, and a grocery sack. Dark, muddy patches covered their legs and Nosedive's shirt was missing half a sleeve. Wildwing's beak had a distinctly darker hue to it. Despite the ragged appearance, both wore huge smiles and seemed in high spirits.

"Have fun?" Tanya queried when they came closer.

"Nope," Wildwing joked. "Worst day of my life."

"Hah!" Nosedive scoffed. "You should have seen him, Tanya. I had no idea he could climb cliffs that quickly."

"You were diving from higher up," the elder reminded.

"Well, there's leftovers in the fridge if you're hungry," Tanya offered. Considering it was nearly nine o'clock at night, they'd probably eaten out.

"Cool," Nosedive grinned. "I'm starving!"

"I thought that fish platter would have stuffed you for a week!" Wildwing exclaimed, eyes wide in amazement. They'd stopped at one of the cantinas on the beach for dinner. Crazy Jim's Crab Shanty issued a challenge to any who ate there: eat the entire Fresh Fish Fiesta in one hour and the meal was free. Nosedive had accepted and completed the challenge, earning the cheers and admiration of all who watched.

"So? I need more cake." Raising an arm, he waved farewell to his sibling and headed to the galley.

"He's going to make himself sick doing that one of these days," Wildwing muttered.

"And he'll stop when he does," Tanya assured. Then again, maybe he wouldn't. It was impossible to tell with Nosedive.

"I'm going to go dump this stuff," Wildwing said with a yawn. "You up for some chess?"

"Not now," she refused. "I've got some upgrades to finish. Mallory might be interested." As soon as the name left her mouth, she thought better of it. "On second thought, try Grin. I'd stay as far away from Mallory as possible right now."

"She still upset?" Wildwing scoffed. "That was almost ten hours ago!"

"I don't know what it is, but she's wound tight," Tanya warned. The more she thought about it, the more she realized she should warn Nosedive. Even if she didn't find out what he did, he certainly didn't deserve to walk into that sort of rage unprepared. Her shoulder still ached from where Mallory had flipped her.

"Thanks for the tip." Yawning again, Wildwing headed towards his room. "Maybe I'll just turn in early."

"Night." She watched as the white drake ambled down the hallway leading to their bunks. The moment he turned the corner, she jumped out of her chair and hurried to the kitchen.

Nosedive was humming to himself, half dancing to his made-up tune as he added a scoop of ice cream to the top of the slice of cake on his plate. His belongings had been abandoned by the door in favor of the evening snack.

"Hey, Tawny," he cheerfully greeted when he turned around to put the box of ice cream back in the freezer. "Want any?"

"No, thanks," she refused. Eating this late at night only kept her up and gave her bad dreams. "I might have some for breakfast."

"I like the way you think, girly girl!" Emphatically stabbing the cake, he took a huge bite and leaned on the counter. "So, what's up?"

"Did you do something to Mallory earlier?"

"Um…" He glanced towards the ceiling as if the answer were written up there. "I don't think so."

"She seems pretty pissed. You're sure you didn't do anything?"

Shrugging, he continued to pay more attention to his snack than Tanya's questioning.

"Whatever you did," Tanya admonished, "She's still mad. I'd apologize or avoid her for the rest of the week if I were you."

"Cool. Thanks for the tip." He really should learn to swallow before talking.

Astounded at his nonchalant attitude and complete disregard of her warning and lack of manners, Tanya gave up. She'd done her part. If he wanted to get himself killed, that was his business.

0000

Nosedive mulled over Tanya's words as he finished his cake. Mallory had been pretty upset when he'd brushed her off earlier in favor of spending the day with his brother; but, he really didn't think she'd stay mad about it this long. Then again, this was Mallory McMallard; she could be mad about something until the end of time if she wanted to be.

Deciding he really didn't feel like running for his life or hiding for the rest of the week, he dumped the dirty dishes in the sink and went in search of his girlfriend. Considering how late it was, she would be in one of three places: the gym, the rec room, or her bunk. If she was in her bunk, he wasn't about to bother her. Only a fool would face a lion in its den. He may be brash, but he wasn't a fool. The rec room was on the way to the gym, so he decided to check there first.

Duke was the only one in the rec room. Some show about the history of the Hope Diamond was on the History Channel. As interesting as that would have been to watch, he declined the one-eyed duck's offer of company. No, he had a mission. Besides, he wouldn't admit it, but he knew he'd fall asleep as soon as he sat down on the couch and relaxed.

Thankfully, Mallory was in the gym. She was dressed in her judogi, gracefully flowing from one kata to the next. Nosedive stayed out of the way and let her continue through the exercises, perfecting her martial arts. He knew better than to interrupt her, especially if she was in any kind of mood like Tanya had described. Moving quietly across the room, he took a seat on the pile of mats against the mirrored wall next to her.

"What do you want?" Mallory demanded, not stopping her practiced movements.

"Thought I'd let you know I'm back. Want to go out for dinner and a movie tomorrow?"

"You sure you wouldn't rather go with your brother?" Her angry response was punctuated with an emphatic kick to the air and two swift punches.

"If I wanted to go with him, I'd ask him," Nosedive calmly informed. He wasn't about to let her bait him.

Stopping her kata, Mallory turned to face the blond drake, hands on hips, barely disguised annoyance and anger marring her face.

"Nosedive." She said his name with the condescension of a teacher to a very stupid pupil. "You can't treat a girlfriend like that. You're rude, inconsiderate, and self-absorbed. Honestly, I don't know what made me agree to go out with you in the first place."

"My rugged good looks?" Smiling brightly at her, he tried to strike a sexy pose.

Mallory's half laugh and averted gaze were all the response he needed to know that he was safe from any physical harm at the moment.

"Look, it's not really my hatching day," he reminded.

"Duh, I now that. No duck hatches in Archem. Not this early, at least."

"Did I tell you why I picked today instead of my real hatching day?"

"No." She continued to stand above him, glaring down.

"Sit," he asked, patting the mats next to himself. "Please?" He tried again when she didn't move.

Relenting, she sat facing him instead of next to him.

"Today's the anniversary of when Canard pulled Wing and me from the slave lines." He tried to sound confident as he told her his reasoning, but his voice cracked slightly anyway. Clearing his throat, he continued. "I'll celebrate my real hatching day when we get back to Puckworld and my parents are there to do it right. Until then, I think I'd rather celebrate my freedom."

"Oh." Mallory carefully studied him, shocked at the explanation. No wonder he'd wanted to spend the day with Wildwing instead of her or anyone else. "But, I thought Canard didn't start putting the team together until Julen…"

"He didn't. Or, he started with Wing and me. We were the first he recruited. Good thing too; Wing was in pretty bad shape when he found us."

"So, you two were with the resistance for almost four months before he tracked down the rest of us?"

"Yeah," Nosedive nodded. "We needed it." Shrugging, he tried to play it off as nothing. "So, I'm sorry if I offended you earlier."

"No," she refused. "I'm sorry I didn't know. I should have."

"Kind of hard to know if I didn't say anything."

"You want to talk about it?"

Nosedive thought for a moment. So far, he'd only spoken to Grin about his enslavement. He wasn't sure if he wanted Mallory to know everything that had happened during that fifteen months. Still, he knew talking with someone else did help.

"Not much to say, really. Wing had been pretty sick when they closed down our camp and started moving us to another one. He was lucky he could walk again when that happened; the ones who couldn't were shot. Canard took us to the resistance headquarters and we were fed and kept in isolation until they were sure we didn't have anything contagious. After that, we just ate and slept a lot. Once Wing started gaining weight again, Canard brought you in, then the others. The rest, as they say, is history."

Mallory lay a hand on his shoulder, showing her support without words.

Nosedive half smiled and lay his own hand atop hers. Lightly squeezing it, he stood. He must have worn himself out more than he'd thought today. The only thing he wanted at this moment was to go to bed.

"So, you forgive me?" he asked hopefully.

"Maybe," Mallory smirked. "Don't think you can get out of trouble that easily. You really need to learn how to communicate better and how to treat a lady."

"Aw, what?" Nosedive stared at her, shocked. He'd just opened up about something very painful and she still wasn't going to forgive him? Weren't girls supposed to be into sharing their feelings and all that mush?

"Go get some sleep," she ordered. "We'll talk about this later."

Nodding, he turned to leave. Mallory's firm grasp on his bicep stopped him before he had taken two steps. Turning him around, she wrapped her arms around him and rested her head on his shoulder. Stunned at the sudden close contact, he hesitated before returning the hug. A contented smile replaced the tired expression on his face as he relaxed into her embrace.

"I'm glad you both made it," she softly whispered. Giving him a quick squeeze, she broke away from the hug and returned to her place on the mats. "Good night, Nosedive." With that, she again dropped into a deep squat and started her katas.

He couldn't have hidden the smile she'd given him if he wore the mask itself.


	3. The Date

**AN:** Here's your next installment of Prankster and Soldier! I hope everybody enjoyed their St. Patrick's Day. This is another ultra long chapter. The next one is shorter; I promise!

* * *

**March 18, 1997**

Third period of the Black Cats at Anaheim saw the Mighty Ducks ahead by two. Try as they might, the Cats hadn't managed to get a single puck past Wildwing. With only five minutes remaining, they were determined to get at least one goal if not even up the score.

Nosedive was in the perfect position to try for another point and Duke saw it. The blond was more than prepared when the puck came flying at him over the opposing team's right defense. Swatting the airborn object back to its proper place on the ice, he gave it a hard wrist shot towards the Black Cat's goalie. Growling in frustration at Krutsch's deft block, he tried to get in position for a rebound.

"Fat chance, bird brain," Pelech taunted as he snatched the puck before Nosedive had full control of it. Speeding off towards Wildwing, Pelech dodged Tanya's open ice check and passed to a teammate before she could try again.

Using his incredible speed, Nosedive gave chase, determined not to let them get a shot at his goal. Duke and Mallory were right behind him, each willing and able to take out the opposition.

Pelech had the puck again and took the shot from mid-ice. The puck went wide, bouncing off the wall behind the net.

Wildwing circled his goal and took possession, guarding the puck until he could hand it off to his brother. Tapping the sable disk lightly, he sent it straight for the youngest Mighty Duck. Taking the pass, Nosedive sped out of the goal zone and towards center ice, eager for another shot in the remaining four minutes.

"Face it, man. This game's ours," Nosedive taunted as Pelech yet again tried to interfere with his plans. He was so focused on Pelech that he neglected to see Weissberg's gargantuan form charging at him.

The Black Cat's enforcer plowed into Nosedive with the speed of an irate bull, lifting him from the ice and into the glass barrier.

Time seemed to slow down as Nosedive's feet left the ice. He expected the jarring pain of his body hitting the unforgiving tempered glass; he didn't expect to go through it head first. Unable to stay up without the bottom support, the glass panel cracked into several large pieces and came down on the duck's right shoulder and back, shattering into smaller pieces at the contact. Stunned by the rough assault and showering glass shards, he fell to the ice.

"BRRRRP!" Loud chirping from the referee's whistle halted the game and the players who had continued towards the Black cat's goal stopped and turned around to see what was going on.

Groaning and shaking his head, Nosedive pulled himself back to his feet. His ears were ringing from more than just the whistle. He carefully removed his helmet and bent over to shake small pieces of glass out of his hair. Glancing towards the audience, he saw a father and two little girls sitting in the seats directly behind where the glass had been. Shattered debris littered the floor on their side and the ice on his.

"You guys okay?" Nosedive asked, straightening up. Reaching down the back of his neck, he tried to get at more glass trapped between his padding and feathers. Bright red covered the end of his beak and dripped to the ice.

"Yes," the father assured while both girls stared at him with wide eyes. One slowly nodded while the other pulled her knees up and hid her face behind them.

Giving them a thumbs up, he turned at a light touch on his left shoulder. Wildwing tilted his head questioningly, concern evident behind his mask.

"I'm good, bro," the younger assured. Gingerly touching the cut on his beak, he winced. "I needed a beak-job anyway." He wasn't too worried about the large amount of blood flowing from the gash; beak wounds always bled badly. Besides, it only hurt when he touched it.

"You should have Dr. Lowe take a look at you."

"Yeah, yeah." Rolling his eyes, he continued to dig at the glass trapped down his back. "Hey, can you get some of this for me?" Resting hands on knees, he lowered his head so Wildwing could get a better look at where the glass was.

Shaking his head, Wildwing began pulling chunks of glass out from his brother's gear. This was pretty typical. Nosedive was always the one to get into messy situations, secure in the knowledge that he'd be there to pull him out. Not that Wildwing minded; it was kind of nice knowing he'd always be needed.

"What's the damage?" Mallory demanded as she came to a stop near them.

"Other than glass all over the place?" Nosedive rhetorically asked. "A power play for us after this is cleaned up."

"You sure you're okay, kid?" Duke looked worried. "That glass ain't exactly light. Looked like the whole thing came down on ya."

"No duh," Nosedive smirked. Pulling at his jersey's neck, he tried to loosen another irritating shard that had worked its way under his shoulder pad.

"You're going to have to get your jersey off to get the rest of it," Wildwing interrupted. "Let's get out of the way so this can get cleaned up." When Nosedive agreed and straightened, Wildwing began pushing him towards the tunnel.

Tanya frowned at the blood dripping from his beak. It probably wasn't a bad cut, but she wanted a closer look at it to be sure he didn't need stitches. Keeping pace with the Flashblades, she stopped them at their bench.

"I need to see that cut," Tanya said as she stepped in front of them. "Do you mind?" She held her hand near Nosedive's beak, ready to take a better look if he agreed.

"Nah. Go ahead." Wincing, he let her gently tilt his head at a better angle so she could inspect the damage.

"There's too much blood," she muttered. "Hang on a sec." Leaning over the barrier, she snagged a water bottle. "Hey, Phil, could you maybe pass me that towel?"

"Sure." The blue-suited human grabbed the closest hand towel to him and handed it to Tanya. "I can't believe he went through the glass like that! This is going to cost a fortune to fix, not to mention the delays and—"

"Not that one!" Throwing it in his face, she clarified her demand. "A clean one. He doesn't need an infection."

Rolling his eyes, Phil complied and found a clean towel in the corner bin before continuing his ranting. Forget concern for the safety of his players, he needed the rink to be in perfect working order for the minimum cost!

Turning her attention back to Nosedive, Tanya gently dabbed at the wound. "Try to stand still, will you?" Squirting a steady stream of water over the obscuring blood, she finally uncovered the source of the cut. A gash about an inch long ran across the right side of his beak. It didn't look too deep. Satisfied that it wasn't bad, she pressed the towel over the cut. "You'll be fine. Just keep some pressure on it and it should stop pretty soon."

Putting his hand over hers, Nosedive kept pressure on the wound as she released her hold. He waved to the crowd to let them know he was okay as Wildwing pushed him off the ice. Stepping into the waiting crowd of team medics, media, and arena crew crammed into the tunnel, he allowed himself to be led back to the arena medical center.

Half an hour later, the shattered panel had been replaced, broken glass removed, and everyone was back on the ice for the final minutes of the game.

Nosedive almost felt sorry for the Black Cats as he glimpsed Mallory's scowl. He'd spent the break in the medical center and had returned to the team only a minute before they were called back to the rink. Judging by the way she'd been ranting and pacing, the opposing team was in for a beating.

Ignoring the now dulled pain in his face, he focused on Duke. He was prepared for the pass as Duke won the face off and powered forward, determined to score on the power play he'd earned them. Having a full thirty five minutes to rest gave both teams renewed energy for the short time remaining. Play continued as quickly and forcefully as if the game had just started.

The remaining four minutes of game time was a guaranteed power play for the ducks. Weissburg had been ejected on a game misconduct penalty. Lucky for him; Mallory was out for blood. If he'd been on the ice, an actual brawl might have broken out.

Eyes narrowed, Mallory glared death at every Cat who dared come near her. Just because the Ducks played clean most of the time didn't mean they didn't know a few dirty tricks. She'd learned more than a few in the military and was determined to use every single one of them in retribution for injuring her teammate. If the ref's noticed her expertly disguised tripping, elbowing, slashing, and cross checking, they didn't call her out on it. Each time a Black Cat howled foul and the tape was reviewed, she came away looking completely innocent.

Finally, the end game buzzer sounded. Neither team had managed a score in the final minutes, despite a six on five advantage for the ducks.

Cheering their victory, the ducks returned to their locker room.

0000

Despite the minor injury and rough game, the ducks were in a great mood. They'd won yet again and Wildwing had earned his tenth shutout of the season.

Nosedive slowly rotated his right arm in a circle, stretching stiff muscles from where the glass had come down on him. His beak was sore and he generally ached all over.

"Man, I'm too young to feel like this," he joked as he gingerly removed his shoulder pads. "I might spend the night in the sauna."

"You need to see Dr. Lowe again?" Wildwing asked, noticing his sibling massaging his shoulder.

"Nah," Nosedive brushed off the concern. "Just need to ice it and it should be fine."

Gingerly removing the mask, Wildwing flipped it over and began removing the softpad he'd lined the inside with. The thin, foam padding was sweat soaked and the adhesive had began loosening. Normally, the mask was extremely comfortable. It fit as if it had been custom made for his face and his alone. However, the sunburn he'd earned last Tuesday had made wearing the metallic object extremely uncomfortable. Setting the mask on the shelf above his stall, he took a seat and began removing his skates and padding. He wasn't even aware of how often he kept scratching at the peeling skin in an attempt to gain some relief.

"Cut that out," Duke chided. "You're gonna make it worse."

"I think the only thing that would make it worse is more sun," the leader calmly reminded. However, he did stop scratching and instead reached for the tube of calendula gel he'd stashed with his gear. He'd been using the flower based remedy to help with the irritation. It had worked admirably well; the first time Wildwing had gotten sunburned after arriving in Anaheim had been far worse.

"Here," Wildwing held the tube out to Nosedive once he'd finished with it. "Might help."

Nosedive smirked at the offer, but took the tube anyway. For now, he had a small bandage on the cut. He'd put the cream on it when he changed the bandage. Setting the tube on the bench next to him, he continued removing his padding, wincing as stray pieces of glass made themselves known. He couldn't wait to get into the shower and completely rid his body of the irritating shards. He couldn't imagine how humans dealt with glass going down their back like that; he at least had feathers to keep it from cutting too badly.

"I know I'm ready for a night out on the town," Mallory smiled as she strode off towards her and Tanya's private showers. Her black bodysuit conformed nicely to every curve, highlighting her very feminine and athletic form. She looked damned good in that body suit and her walk showed it.

Nosedive watched her go, taking in every nuance of her confident stride. It'd taken two days for Mallory to finally decide he had been punished enough. He still didn't know exactly what he had done to tick her off so much last week, but he was glad they'd finally made up. Women could be so confusing.

A roll of tape hitting his back pulled Nosedive from his reverie.

"Close your mouth, kid. You're drooling." Duke joked. Sighing in relief, he removed his undershirt and tossed it into the laundry bin in the corner. The girls were already gone, so it was safe to walk around half naked. In fact, Duke had been known to streak through the dressing room on occasion just to see how embarrassed the reporters would get.

"I am not!"

Unfortunately, that shower was going to have to wait. Phil opened the door to the locker room, allowing three camera crews and half a dozen reporters in for a short post-game interview.

Wildwing may have already removed the majority of his padding, but he wasn't about to present what he felt was an unprofessional appearance to the noisome media. He hastily stood and grabbed the mask from its resting place and covered his sunburned beak, ignoring the fact that he hadn't washed it or replaced the softpad yet.

Laughing quietly at his brother's vanity, Nosedive leaned back and waited for the swarm to come to him. His trip through the hockey glass was guaranteed to be the focus of their questioning.

"Nosedive, how are you feeling after that hit from Weissberg?" a particularly young looking reporter demanded. The blond boy couldn't have been much older than Nosedive and had already landed a job with some sports show or other. "He certainly put you through the boards!"

Staring at the foam covered microphone thrust under his bandaged beak, he smiled and relished the attention.

"I'm fine," he boasted. "My grandma hits harder!"

"Is this going to change how you play the game?" another queried.

"I don't know," he mused. "Is it going to stop you from asking pointless questions?" If they were going to ask stupid questions, they should expect stupid answers. Wildwing's barely contained laughter only encouraged him to continue. "It might change the way I play. Think I can get a suit of armor?"

"Um…" The sandy-haired reporter tried to recover. "I thought you already wore armor."

"Sure, whenever Mallory tries to kill me for putting air horns under her seat."

The questioning continued far longer than he would have liked. It was only when Mallory reappeared from her side of the locker room that he caught a break.

Mallory posed in the doorway, drawing every eye to her seductive form. A burgundy mini-dress tightly hugged every curve of her toned body. Matching heels and flowing, pink scarf completed her ultra-fashionable ensemble. Only a true fashionista could have done her hair and makeup in the record time it had taken Mallory to go from professional athlete to supermodel. If she had looked good in the body suit earlier, she was drop dead gorgeous now. Her short skirt exposed a lot of leg and the deep cut neckline left just enough to the imagination.

Sailing towards the exit, she paused just in front of Nosedive, giving him the best view of her posterior he could ever hope for. Her attention, however, was directed to the older Flashblade.

"I'm going out for a night on the town. See you guys later!" Throwing a quick glance at Nosedive, she met his eye and then dropped her gaze to the bench he was sitting on, quietly signaling for him to look inside. Lifting a hand in farewell, she made for the exit.

"Care for some company?" Duke offered as he smoothly blocked the way. He stood tall, not minding in the least that he was shirtless and still fairly smelly.

Mallory crossed her arms and looked him up and down, appraising his physic. Even in heels, she didn't quite reach the gray drake's eye level. After a quick assessment, she pressed one finger to the center of his sweaty, well muscled chest and pushed him out of the way.

"Sorry, Duke. Girl's night." Smirking, she once more looked him over. "Unless I'm missing something, you're not a girl." With that, she made her exit.

Silence reigned for a full thirty seconds after her departure. Finally regaining his composure, Nosedive stood and retrieved his clean clothes from inside the bench he sat on. Something crinkled as he lifted the neatly folded clothing. Making sure to keep it hidden, he headed towards the showers. Unfortunately for Wildwing, he was no longer there to distract the buzzards and questioning turned to discussing the captain's latest shutout.

During the few moments he had alone before Duke or Grin showed up, he quickly checked what Mallory had hidden for him. A note was tucked inside the folds of his shirt. The address to somewhere was written in her precise penmanship along with a short note to dress nice and come hungry. Completely unaware of the dopey smile covering his face, he tucked the note into his pants pocket and left his clothing on the bench just outside the showers. He'd never cleaned up from a game so quickly in his life.

0000

Finally, Wildwing made good his escape from the inane media. He'd put up with their questioning for a full fifteen minutes before standing, turning his back to them, and continuing to strip down to his body suit. He didn't like being rude to them, but there were some reporters who just wouldn't get the message any other way.

The sound of rushing water from the showers greeted him as he ambled into the tiled bathroom. Nosedive stood at the long mirror, fastidiously combing out his hair. The red counter in front of him was littered with leave-in conditioner, hair spray, mousse, gel, cologne, and any number of other toiletries. His blow dryer was dangerously close to falling off the edge.

He couldn't help but smile as he watched Nosedive quietly singing _I'm Too Sexy_ to himself. His brother had been acting pretty strange lately, going from super happy to quietly elusive to grinning like a court jester. Nosedive had a secret, and Wildwing was determined to figure out what it was.

"Next time, I'm having Grin move the pop machine in front of the dressing room door." Wildwing didn't speak loudly but his brother still jumped at the unexpected interruption.

Nosedive looked away from his own reflection and flashed a quick smile before returning to fine-tuning the way his bangs fell.

"Going out?" the white drake asked, quirking an eyebrow at his sibling. He thought they were going to duel for title of Master Street Fighter after dinner. He'd never really played many video games back on Puckworld, but he enjoyed the occasional battles he and Nosedive would set up. Besides, Grin and Tanya had agreed to join in. He was sure they could get Duke to participate if they made an interesting enough offer. Maybe the winner would get a box of jelly donuts or something.

"Yeah," Nosedive nodded. "Um. Thrash is having this party at his place tonight and I thought I'd drop by."

"Really?" The way Nosedive wouldn't meet his eye and slightly guilty look he tried hide told him that wasn't quite the whole story. "I don't remember you saying anything about a party." Nosedive normally told him about plans with Thrash and Mookie as soon as they'd been finalized and wouldn't shut up about whatever they were going to do in the days leading up to their events.

"Must have slipped my mind." That was definitely a guilty look. Setting down the comb on the counter, he quickly unplugged the blow dryer and gathered up his stuff. "Gotta split!" Tossing a bottle half-full of blue gel to the white drake, he hurried out of the room. "Thanks for the loan."

Glancing at the bottle, he saw that it was his hair gel. Nosedive had neglected to ask if he could borrow it. Typical. At least it didn't look like he'd used a lot of it.

Perplexed by his younger sibling's actions, Wildwing set the bottle on the counter and grabbed a clean towel. He'd find out what Nosedive was up to later. It couldn't be anything too bad if it made him pay more attention to how he looked.

0000

Mallory smiled quietly to herself as she and Nosedive rode two duckcycles to their second destination for the night. Dinner had been amazing and neither one was quite ready for the evening to end. She'd been pleasantly surprised when Nosedive had shown up wearing clothing without holes. When she'd told him to dress nice, she hadn't expected the very fashionable, dark washed jeans, form fitting black button down shirt, or off-white blazer. Somehow, he'd managed to put together an outfit that was stylish with a hint of rebellion. His long hair being tied back in a neat ponytail wasn't half bad either.

He flashed her a slightly confused look as they pulled into the parking lot of Branagan's Irish Pub. People crowded outside the two story building, laughing, drinking, and smoking.

"Figured yesterday was St. Patrick's day, so we'll enjoy a little Hibernian partying," Mallory informed him as they parked.

"Hibernian?"

"Irish, Celtic. Not too different from our Hibernia. Figured you'd know I had Hibernian roots with my last name." She was only half-focused on the conversation. Locating that stupid little card she'd hidden in the duckcycle's storage compartment was more important.

"You know, I'd never really thought about it." Shrugging, he watched her searching for something.

There! How had it gotten wedged in that little gap under the seat? Wiggling it free, she carefully inspected the credit card sized object for damage. Satisfied that it appeared legit, she held it up and offered it to her boyfriend.

"Here, you'll need this to get in. But," she emphasized the word and stared pointedly at him. "If I catch you using it to buy alcohol, I'm switching Duke's hair mousse with Reddi Whip and blaming you."

Nosedive took the card and looked at it, shock registering on his face as he realized exactly what she was giving him. The fake ID declared him to be twenty one. It was a very, very good forgery; even the holographic state seal was indistinguishable from the real thing.

"Wait. _You're_ giving me a fake ID?" Disbelief shaded his question.

"We're young. Live a little," she smiled mischievously. "Now, do you want to go party or not?" She unwound the scarf from her neck and crammed it into the under-seat compartment. "And I suggest you leave your blazer here. It'll be pretty warm in there once the dancing gets started."

"What if the bouncer recognizes me?" Frowning, he took her advice and neatly folded his jacket before placing it inside his own cycle. "Come on, Mal! My birthday was all over the news last week. Everyone knows I'm eighteen."

"Hah!" She couldn't help it. Here she was, leading him into trouble for a change, and he was actually afraid of getting caught. "He's not a hockey fan." With that, she turned and walked towards the red bricked, Victorian house-turned-pub.

Confidently walking up the concrete stairs, she smiled at the pro wrestler wannabe wearing a plaid flat hat. He nodded her in and didn't pay any attention to Nosedive as he followed her.

Loud music from guitars, pipes, a fiddle, and some sort of drum echoed from somewhere, despite the band being completely out of sight. They entered what had obviously been the front parlor. To the left was a sitting room with couches and a few bistro tables. Directly in front of them was a ticket counter with a very bored looking college student.

"Hey, Mitch!" Mallory greeted as she leaned on the counter, making sure to give him a good view. In the months since she'd discovered Branagan's, she'd gotten to know the morose boy as well as anyone possibly could. Blue hair, multiple chains around his neck, and punk rock t-shirts all indicated someone far more lively than the facade he presented while at the ticket booth. However, Mallory had yet to see him display interest in anything other than barely completing his job.

"Hey, Mallory," he greeted in a monotone. Looking at Nosedive, he let his placid stare ask the question.

"Name's Nosedive," he introduced himself. "Who's the band?"

"Gaelic Storm." It could have been Frank Sinatra for all the enthusiasm Mitch lacked. "Cover charge is ten bucks. ID's please."

Mallory pointedly looked at Nosedive. She didn't have a purse on her. It was a good thing he didn't even seem annoyed about paying the cover for both of them; she'd have had to give him another lecture about the responsibilities of a good boyfriend if he'd complained.

"ID, Mallory?" Mitch made the demand flatly, not even a trace of annoyance in his voice.

"Oh, Mitch," she pouted, fluttering her eyes at him. "You know me. Do you really need to see it?" One of these days, she was going to get a reaction out of him.

"ID please." Fish had more life behind their eyes than this human.

Shaking her head in defeat, she reached into her bra and retrieved the card. Showing it to him, she was pleased to note Nosedive's embarrassed reaction to where she kept it. Staring deeply into Mitch's eyes, she slowly slid the returned drivers license back into place. Nope, not even a hint of interest, curiosity, or vitality. Nosedive was doing his best not to stare and was studiously focusing on the myriad posters plastered on the wall.

"Wrists," Mitch intoned as he slowly pulled out two purple wrist bands. At least he didn't joke about banding wild birds for tracking purposes. Perhaps there was an upside to dealing with cashiers who could double as doorstops.

Proof of admission firmly secured around their wrists, Mallory and Nosedive walked around the ticket counter and through the doors on the other side. Steps led down to the concert stage and dance floor. The walls had been whitewashed and decorated to resemble an old Irish pub. Half-drunken people crowded into the open area in front of the stage, dancing, clapping, and singing along. Hearing aid manufacturers would have a bonanza if they advertised to the deafened patrons the next morning.

Five musicians jumped around energetically as they sang and played in unison. Instruments littered the stage, either waiting for the next band or to be played by the current musicians. One woman skilfully played the fiddle while the bearded man playing the bodhran drum danced around her, moving his feet in time to the fast paced rhythm he beat. The two men playing a guitar and mandolin sang into microphones while making funny faces at each other. The last member, a tall and skinny man, sat on a stool playing a strange instrument. A burgundy bag with several pipes extending from the back was strapped around his waist and elbow. Moving his elbow slowly, he pumped air into the instrument and played the clarinet styled pipe extending from the front.

"Whoo!" Grabbing his hand, Mallory pulled Nosedive along. She knew this song and loved the ultra fast pace. Once they were firmly in the middle of the raucous crowd, she joined in on the dancing and laughing. Nosedive didn't know the first thing about Hibernian music, but that never stopped him from having a good time. His dance style was better suited to a rock concert; he lacked the light footed grace of Irish step dancers. Then again, there weren't that many around here who knew step dancing.

_Gather up the pots and the old tin can_

_And the mash, and the corn, the barley, and the bran_

_And then run like the devil from the excise man_

_Keep the smoke from rising, Barney_

_Now swing to the left, now swing to the right_

_Sure, the excise man can dance all night_

_He's drinkin 'up the tea 'til the broad daylight_

_In the hills of Connemara_

As the music came to an end, Mallory turned to the young drake next to her. That first song had been nothing more than a warm up for either of them; however, the band decided to switch gears and play something a little slower. Taking the opportunity to talk a little, they moved towards the back of the room where it was slightly quieter.

"Enjoying yourself?" the redhead asked.

"This music is weird," Nosedive laughed. "But cool. I don't think I've ever heard anything like this before."

"Didn't you ever go to any Hibernian festivals?"

"Nah," he shrugged. "Too expensive."

"Really?" Frowning, she studied him. Her family hadn't exactly been well off, but they'd made a point to go to the Hibernian festival every year. Her father was mad for his heritage and tried to instill the same sense of pride in his children. Stories of what great warriors her ancestors had been and their passion for battle had been amongst Mallory's favorites as a duckling. "I guess I never really thought about it."

"What's that instrument the one dude's got under his arm?"

"That?" Glancing at the skinny guy sitting on a stool, she made sure she knew what he was talking about. "Uillean pipes. Be glad they don't have bagpipes down here. We wouldn't be able to hear anything for a week!"

"Interesting." He was completely focused on the strange instrument.

It was rare that he concentrated on something other than a video game that intently. His sapphire eyes drank in every movement of the humans hands, carefully studying how the instrument was played. Knowing his skill with the piano, Mallory wondered if he was thinking about picking up a new instrument. Stars, she hoped not. The piano was at least on the arena level and she didn't have to listen to him practice whenever the desire struck him. If he purchased uillean pipes, he could carry them anywhere.

"They're very expensive," she said, trying to dissuade him of the notion before it solidified in his head.

"So?" Shrugging, he leaned closer. "I bet Wildwing could learn the guitar parts pretty easy. You play anything?"

"I like to play with minds." Not that he'd ever realize just how often she messed with his.

"Hmmm…" He continued to watch the musicians, tapping his foot in time to the music. "I bet you could play that drum. Looks pretty cool."

"It's a bodhran. And, no, I'm not learning an instrument. If you want to start a band, ask Grin or Duke."

Sitting out simply wasn't an option for either of them once the next jig started. Lyrics spilled from the guitarists with speed an auctioneer would envy. Three girls with tightly curled hair danced out on stage, spinning and twirling in unison. Their feet moved ever bit as fast as the song, each step precisely performed and flowing into the next. The odd thing was, neither of the girls moved their arms; all three kept their limbs firmly held to their sides, hands fisted.

Nosedive and Mallory linked wings and began dancing wildly. Continuing to spin, Mallory guided them towards the edge of the room where she had spotted a small pile of shoes. Stepping in time to the lively tune, she kicked one foot towards the pile and then the other, relieving herself of the red high heels. Now that her feet were free, she threw even more energy into the wild dance, laughing at her partner's shocked expression.

"I don't want to step on your feet!" He leaned close and tried to make himself heard above the din of pipes and drum.

"Don't worry about it!" she laughed. "You couldn't catch me if you tried!" To prove her point, she gracefully danced away from him, weaving in and out of the whirling crowd.

Nosedive laughed and tried to follow. Impossibly, the music sped up even more and the crowd kept up, stomping their feet and spinning in wild circles. A quick glimpse of red hair bobbing up and down near an opening at the center told him where his date had run off to.

Mallory laughed wildly as she saw Nosedive trying to get around a bull of a man and his rather trashily dressed date. Rather than focus on him, she continued in her imitation of a step dance. She'd seen plenty of it on her excursions to Branagan's in the past and had enough skill as a martial artist to pick up on several of the steps. She knew it wasn't exactly perfect, but that wasn't what mattered. People around her began clapping in time, appreciating the made up jig and encouraging her to continue. Drinking in the attention, she continued to move in time to the music, swiftly putting one bare foot in front of the other, skipping around the small opening.

"All right!" The lead singer called out as the song came to an abrupt end. "I see that some of you have had enough beer to think you can dance." He smiled at the raucous laughter from the audience before continuing. "Those of you who aren't dancing, go get another drink. Now, we're going to teach you a simple step dance. Our own lovely Kathleen here will demonstrate."

"Hello, Anaheim!" Kathleen called out as she held the fiddle and bow to her sides. "Do you feel like dancing?" cupping the hand holding her bow to her ear, she listened to their shout. "Oh, come on. I don't think you're drunk enough yet. I said, do you feel like dancing?" Nodding approvingly at the much louder roar, she straightened. "Now, watch my feet. It's really very simple." Lifting the skirt of her black dress, she performed each movement very precisely, calling them out as she performed them. "Step, step, skip, kick. Step, step, turn, step, kick." Laughing at them, she moved her feet very quickly, beating out a rhythm with the hard heel of her shoes. "If you do it right, it'll sound a bit like this. Think you can keep up?" Looking at the confused faces of her audience, she tried again. "Okay, now. Do it at the same time as me. We'll start out slow and see how many of you can keep up." Hiking up a handful of skirt, she carefully tucked it into her belt so her lower legs and feet would remain easily visible while she played.

"Finally found me?" Mallory glanced at Nosedive as he managed to make his way back to her. "Told you I wouldn't get stepped on."

"When'd you learn to dance like that?" He'd never seen step dancing before tonight and certainly hadn't seen Mallory dance anything like this. She'd done some ice dancing on occasion but that was really it as far as he knew.

"I didn't," she shrugged. "It's easy enough if you pay attention to the dancers when they're up there."

"Are you ready!" Kathleen called out, drawing attention back to the band. "And a one, and a two, and a one, two, three!" Striking bow against strings, she began a slow reel and danced in time to it, calling out each step.

"Come on," Mallory encouraged, linking her elbow through Nosedive's. They both kept glancing at each other as they tried madly to keep up with the tune. The bodhran called out a steady beat; two verses in, it began to go faster. The ducks easily kept up with the increase in pace. The fourth verse and fifth picked up even more. By the time the song had reached its sixth verse, people were bumping into each other in an attempt to keep up. Being professional athletes and both accustomed to dancing, Nosedive and Mallory were among the few who managed to make it to the end of the song still standing and performing the correct steps.

"Good job!" Kathleen cheered them on once the song was over. "I see we've got us some regular Riverdancers out here. Did the rest of you notice the two birds in the crowd?"

The drummer laughed at her and leaned towards her microphone. "Kind of hard not to notice them. I think they're better than the rest of you lot out there!"

"Damn straight!" Mallory shouted, letting them all know just how good a time she was having.

"What do you think, Kathy," the drummer asked. "Think we can get them up here?"

"I don't know," she played doubtful. "They might not be up to it."

Rolling her eyes, Mallory crossed her arms and stared at the musicians trying to encourage her and Nosedive up on stage.

"Come on, don't be shy," the guitarist added his voice into the mix. "Come up here and dance for us!"

"Why not?" Nosedive shrugged and jumped up on stage, bowing to the cheers and claps from the audience. He'd noticed an unmanned keyboard in the back. "Anyone here going to use that keyboard?"

"You play?" the guitarist seemed quite surprised.

"Yeah," Nosedive nodded. Bending down, he offered his hand to Mallory. "Come on, Mal Mal. You dance, I'll play."

If she was going to do this, she wasn't going to accept his help up onto the stage. Taking a step back, Mallory got a running start and easily leapt up on the waist-high stage unassisted.

"Sounds good to me," the redhead agreed. She'd never done anything like this, but being a celebrity called for a certain willingness to make a fool of oneself. Fortunately, there were no cameras or news crews around that she could see, so any public humiliation would stay in this room.

"What songs do you know?" Kathleen asked, trying to figure out what they'd do next.

Nosedive played a few quick scales on the keyboard, figuring out its sound. Satisfied with the feel of the instrument, he threw a bright smile at the professional musicians. "You guys start something and I'll follow," he suggested.

"Oh-ho-ho," the piper mock-laughed. "Looks like we've got Mozart up here. Think he can keep up?"

"Well, you know what they say," Kathleen bantered back. "A bird in the band's worth two in the audience."

Mallory couldn't help but roll her eyes at the terrible joke. Then again, she'd gotten used to bird jokes and duck calls since coming to Earth. Someone would have ended up hospitalized by now if she hadn't. Looking back at Nosedive, she couldn't help but smile at his casual shrug.

"Well, this is the Bell of Belfast City," Kathleen introduced the next song. "We'll see just how good hockey players are at the piano and dancing." With that, she once more kissed bow to fiddle, starting out the next lively jig.

_Tell my ma when I go home,_

_The boys won't leave the girls alone,_

_They pulled my hair and stole my comb,_

_But that's all right 'till I go home._

_She is handsome, she is pretty_

_She is the belle of Belfast city,_

_She is courting, one two three_

_Please won't you tell me who is she?_

After hearing the first verse, Nosedive began playing the keyboard, perfectly blending in with the band. Tapping his foot and nodding his head in time to the music, he threw all of his attention into the freeing tune. He could see Mallory gracefully dancing with Kathleen, enjoying herself as well.

_Albert Mooney says he loves her,_

_All the boys are fighting for her,_

_Knock on the door and they ring the bell_

_Oh my true love, are you well?_

_Here she comes, as white as snow,_

_Rings on her fingers and bells on her toes,_

_Old Johnny Mary she says she'll die_

_If she doesn't get the boy with the roving eye. _

Laughing at the lyrics, Mallory danced towards Nosedive, pretending to flirt with him, then making her way over to each of the male band members and dancing with them in turn. She lost herself to the music, completely forgetting that she was on stage and really had no idea how to properly step dance.

_Let the wind and the rain and the hail blow high_

_And the snow come tumbling from the sky_

_She's as nice as apple pie_

_She'll get her own boy, by and by_

_When she gets a lad of her own,_

_She won't tell her ma 'till she comes home,_

_Let the boys stay as they will,_

_For it's Albert Mooney she loves still. _

_Tell my ma when I go home,_

_The boys won't leave the girls alone,_

_They pulled my hair and stole my comb,_

_But that's all right 'till I go home._

_She is handsome, she is pretty_

_She is the belle of Belfast city,_

_She is courting, one two three_

_Please won't you tell me who is she?_

By the end of the song, Mallory had rounded her way back to Nosedive. She rested her elbow on his shoulder, pretending to flirt with him.

"Let's hear it for Nosedive and Mallory!" the guitarist cheered his guest performers. "Bartender!" He pointed from one duck to the other. "A drink for the lovebirds, on me."

"Thank you," Mallory slapped him on the back. "I need it after that crazy song."

Nosedive came up behind her and playfully tugged on her hair, laughing. Jumping off the stage, he offered her a hand down. This time, she accepted his help and lightly leaped off the platform.

Taking a seat on one of the stools at the bar, Mallory leaned her elbows on the counter and ordered a beer. She kept a careful eye on Nosedive to see what he would do. If he'd ordered anything other than the coke he currently gulped down, she'd have had to clobber some sense into him. That would have ruined the night and they were having a great time.

"Hey!" a rather drunk man with a huge handlebar mustache got her attention as he came up to the bar. "You're one of the ducks," he hiccuped.

"No shit, Sherlock," Nosedive told his drink.

Holding back a laugh at the blond's sarcasm, Mallory tried to remain civil. "Yes, I am. Good band tonight."

"Yeah…" he peered at her through glassy eyes. "I watched your game. Ducksch rock!" he crowed at the top of his lungs.

"Haha!" Nosedive and Mallory both laughed at his enthusiasm. Their fans came in all shapes and sizes and, apparently, all levels of sobriety.

"Can I have an… Um…" He moved his hand in the air like he was writing something. "Thing?"

"An autograph? Sorry, I don't have a pen," Mallory told him. She knew Nosedive didn't either. Phil usually demanded they carry pens on them for instances just like this, but they often neglected to. It wasn't her duty to make sure fans could get her signature whenever they wanted it. If they wanted something from her, they could at least meet her halfway and provide both the writing utensil and item to be signed.

"Damn," he sighed. "How bout a feather?"

"Uh, no." Turning her back on the rude human, she tried to focus her attention on her date. "Good job on the keyboard. I almost believed you knew that song."

"Yeah. It's not that hard, you know." He lightly brushed off the compliment. "That stuff wasn't as fast as some of the Anchenian tunes. I just played Ceptra Dais."

"Really? I didn't recognize it."

"Schuse me," the drunk burped and leaned in between the two ducks. "Do you think, maybe, I can get an um…" Frowning, he mimed taking a photo.

"Sorry, buddy," Nosedive frowned at the stench permeating this inebriated ape. "No photos tonight." The last thing they needed was someone taking a picture of him and Mallory together before they were ready to let the team know about their relationship.

Deep furrows spread across the surprisingly thick forehead as his inebriated gaze narrowed. Jutting his head forward, mustache almost touched beak as he stared down the hockey player. There must have been a broken gear somewhere in his brain. Even with the size advantage, he wouldn't have stood a chance against Nosedive if he started a brawl.

"Washn't talkin to you," he slurred, swaying slightly.

"Okay," Mallory broken in, reaching over to push their fan back a step. "We're not doing any photos tonight. I think we've got an autograph thing at Clucky's Diner on Saturday. You can get a photo then if you want."

Smiling at her hand on his shoulder, he didn't hear anything she said. Despite his uncoordination, he managed to grasp her wrist. "Wanna kissh?"

"Bad idea," Nosedive warned. If it had been Tanya or any other girl, he would have stepped in. With Mallory, it was better to sit back and watch. Doing anything else would end up with a lecture afterwords at best and him in traction at worst.

Raising one eyebrow in incredulity, Mallory easily sidestepped the proffered affection. She moved so quickly, even Nosedive had difficulty figuring out just how she managed to end up behind her antagonist and shoving his much larger girth up against the bar stool she had previously been sitting on. Jamming his folded arm into his backbone, Mallory smiled sweetly at him and pushed his head onto the counter. "You keep this up and you'll get a mugshot," she warned. Releasing him, she stepped back and waited for him to leave so she could have her seat back.

Scowling, he pushed himself off the counter. One hand slipped and he fell to the side, sending Mallory's pint of beer flying straight at Nosedive. The amber liquid quickly soaked through his shirt, making the wet fabric cling to his sculpted torso.

"Aw, man!" Nosedive complained as he caught the glass. He was covered from mid-chest down in the alcoholic beverage. "This stuff stinks." Setting the now empty pint on the counter, he stepped back. Holding his wings out slightly, he took in the mess and tried to figure out what to do.

"Shorry?" The drunk mumbled from his new seat on the floor. His head made a hollow thunk as it hit wall behind him. Staring up, he tried to figure out just how he ended up in such an incongruous position.

Mallory had one arm wrapped around her ribs and a hand in front of her beak, trying to hide her laughter. For all the times Nosedive had randomly soaked her, it had taken a drunk fan to properly pay him back.

"This isn't funny, Mallory," the blond deadpanned. "I can't go back smelling like this. Wing'll pluck me if he thinks I've been drinking!"

"Hah!" She gave in to the laughter, allowing it to roll out with as much melody as the still playing music. "He'd never do that. Honestly, he'd let you get away with murder."

"You didn't see him when he found Canard's cigarettes," Nosedive muttered.

"What?"

"Nothing!" Untucking his shirt, he squeezed a small rivulet of liquid from the cloth.

"Just go rinse it out in the bathroom." Waving off the spilled beer as if it was nothing, she move down a seat and ordered another.

Shocked at her complete dismissal of the very strong likelihood that they would get caught, he found the dimly lit bathroom and removed his shirt. The soap dispenser was empty, so he did the best he could with the weak stream of water the faucet produced. Even in the poor lighting, he could see a nice bruise forming on his right shoulder. Laughing to himself, he stepped back and took in his appearance. With his bruised shoulder, cut beak, and added alcoholic cologne, he fancied himself a young Duke. Wringing out as much water as he could, he put the damp shirt back on and returned to the raucous music and dancing.

"Better?" Mallory asked as she finished off her beer. Looking Nosedive up and down, she nodded approvingly. "Your shirt looks better like that," she joked.

"Anything looks good on me," he teased right back, posing to show off his muscles. "Want to dance some more?"

"Why not?" Jumping off the stool, she grabbed his hand and pulled him back into the Hibernian madness.

0000

"You're not driving," Nosedive chided as Mallory climbed onto her duckcycle. Gaelic Storm had finished their set two hours ago, making way for The Finnigans. By the time the third band had finished, the two ducks were willing to call it a night.

"Yes I am." Grabbing her helmet, she strapped it on.

"Mal, you've been drinking. I'm not about to let you drive back. You can ride with me."

"I'm not even buzzed!" She knew her limits and wouldn't even think of driving if she had gone beyond them. Most simply didn't believe she could drink that much and not feel the effects.

"So?" Reaching over, he grabbed the keys before she could stop him and pocketed them. "We're both getting back to the Pond in one piece." Straddling his own cycle, he patted the seat behind him.

"And what are we going to do about mine?" she demanded, hands on hips.

"We'll come back in the morning," he promised.

"Fine, but you have to figure out an excuse so nobody catches us."

"Keep Wing from killing me and I'll come up with something good."

"Fine." Relenting, she took the seat behind him. Scooting forward, she wrapped her arms around his waist and rested her beak on his shoulder. "You still smell like beer."

"Thanks for the reminder," he groaned. Starting up the bike, he tried to focus on the road and not the feeling of her warmth against his back.

0000

"Here." Mallory held out a large, fuzzy, pink robe. "Bathroom's through there."

Nosedive gratefully took the proffered clothing and went into the bathroom to change.

The orderliness of her quarters didn't come as a surprise to the young duck, but the personal touches did. Her bathroom was spotlessly clean; the mirror was free of those obnoxious little flecks that always magically appeared after a few days and her bottles of shampoo and cleansing oil were neatly lined up on the shelf in her shower. A pink, floral curtain was tucked inside the tub, ensuring water wouldn't drip onto the beige bathmat or white tiled floor. Everything was color coordinated in a stylized pale pink and lavender floral pattern. He wasn't exactly sure what he had thought her bathroom would look like; perhaps he'd expected something more barren, more military. He certainly hadn't expected to find it this colorful or girly.

Quickly removing his alcohol ridden clothing and changing into the robe, he emerged.

Mallory took one look at him and burst out laughing. The hem hit him right at the knees, leaving the lower half of his bare legs exposed. Sleeves that hung a little below her wrists stretched tight around his forearms. Despite being pulled closed and tied at the waist, the top of the robe struggled to cover his broad shoulders and muscular chest.

Rather than being embarrassed by how ridiculous he looked, Nosedive dropped his dirty clothes and struck a pose, trying to look as feminine as possible in the robe.

"Why, I do declare," he tried a southern accent. "This is just the most gorgeous thing I've ever tried on." Flipping his hair over his shoulder, he put a hand on his hip and batted his eyes at her.

"Oh! Hahahahaha!" Mallory was laughing so hard she could barely stand up. "Nosedive, you… Hahahaha, you really, hahaha!" She tried taking several deep breaths and looking elsewhere in her quarters. "You should really wear that in the locker room some time."

"I will if you'll let me borrow it."

The laughter took over once more at the matter of fact way he agreed to prance around in her clothing in front of everyone else. Hell, there'd probably be cameras in there too; there usually were after games. He really had no shame when it came to making others laugh and she couldn't help but admire that about him.

Gradually getting control of herself, she bent down and retrieved his garments from the floor.

"I'll get these washed." She continued to force herself to take deep breaths in an attempt to ease the ache in her side from laughing so much and to keep the giggles at bay. She pushed a button on the wall and a panel opened, revealing her small washer and dryer.

"Oops." Quickly snatching the undergarments she'd left to dry on the line strung above the washing units, she tossed them into the bedroom. Well, a little embarrassment was as good a cure as any for a bad case of the giggles. It only took a few moments for her to get the laundry going.

Nosedive didn't pay any attention to what she was doing. Instead, he collapsed on her couch, put his feet up on the coffee table, and turned on the television. Flipping channels, all he found were infomercials, bad movies he'd already seen, and the weather channel. Frustrated at the lack of quality programming at two in the morning, he glanced around her apartment in hopes of finding some sort of movie to watch. A shelf under the television held her dvd player and some movies. He found Ghost in the Darkness, Bottle Rocket, Eraser, and Broken Arrow in Blockbuster cases. He hadn't seen Broken Arrow or Ghost in the Darkness yet, so either one was a good choice.

"Hey," he asked as Mallory returned from her task. "Which sounds better, Ghost in the Darkness or Broken Arrow?"

"Haven't watched either one yet, but Ghost in the Darkness needs to go back first."

"Cool." After setting up the movie, he returned to the couch and sat next to her.

Mallory glanced at him, but turned back to the starting previews after a moment. Sniffing slightly, she leaned closer to him.

"What?" He was confused by the way she was acting.

"Hang on." Leaning in closer, she sniffed right below his neck. "Yeah, I thought so. You still smell like that beer. There's clean towels in the cabinet under the sink."

"You sure you're not smelling your own breath?"

"Hey, I can hold my liquor. And, yes, I'm sure it's not me. You'd better go take a shower if you don't want Wildwing to find out."

"Dang." He stood, frustrated at the hassle one clumsy drunk had caused him. "Fine, I'll be back in a few minutes."

"Wait!" Jumping up, she hurried in front of him. "Let me move some things first."

"I won't mess with your stuff," he promised.

"I doubt you'd want to mess with it," she smirked. "Just, wait a minute."

Shrugging, he waited outside the door while she hid whatever was so embarrassing he couldn't even see it.

"All yours," she declared and headed back to the couch.

Mallory let the previews play through to the start menu while she waited for him to return from his shower. Deciding some popcorn sounded good, she put a bag in the microwave and got it going while she vanished into her bedroom to change into some more comfortable sleep shorts and a tank top. By the time he returned, she had filled two large bowls with popcorn and placed two glasses of water on the coffee table.

"Better?" he asked, his slightly damp hair hanging limply around his face.

After a quick check, Mallory declared him odor-free. They settled down on the couch to watch Val Kilmer fend off lions in the deepest jungles of Africa.

The obnoxiously loud dryer buzzer jarred Nosedive out of the light doze he had fallen into somewhere in the middle of the film. Yawning, he looked over to see Mallory sitting up, rubbing her neck to loosen it from the weird angle she had fallen asleep at on his shoulder.

"Did they get the lions?" she mumbled as she stood and began retrieving his clothing from the dryer.

"Dunno." He yawned again. Stretching his arms above his head, he tried to wake himself up enough to make it back to his own quarters.

Taking his now dry clothing from Mallory, he once again disappeared into the bathroom to change.

"Guess we'll have to watch the rest of the movie tomorrow," Mallory said when he came out, once more in his own attire. She was picking up the empty popcorn bowls and glasses from the coffee table, tidying up their small mess.

"How about after we've gotten some sleep?"

"Sounds like a plan." She stood by the door and opened it for him. "Night."

"Night," he happily murmured as he exited the room and turned towards his own.

"Hey," Mallory caught his attention before he got too far away.

"Yeah?" Turning around to face her, he missed seeing Duke vanish out of sight around a corner.

"I had a good time tonight."

"Me too." Waving once more, he stumbled down the hallway, eager for the comfort of his own bed and a few hours of sleep before morning practice.

0000

"What the hell do you think you're doing?" Duke's voice was low and angry as he stepped in front of Nosedive, blocking the route to his room.

"Uh… Going to bed?" He was really too tired to try figuring out what the former thief was talking about.

"That's not what I mean and you know it. What are you doing coming out of Mallory's bunk at four in the morning?" He leaned closer, demanding an answer.

"Oh, that!" He tried playing innocent. Even though he was now eighteen, they still didn't want the team to know about their excursions. "Uh, nothing?"

"Nosedive." The threatening way Duke growled his name told him he was on thin ice.

It was late, he was tired, and he'd hoped to finally be treated more like an adult now that he was considered one by human standards. Irritated, he tried to side-step the avian roadblock before him and ignore the whole conversation.

"Nuh-uh." He moved with Nosedive, continuing to block the way. "I don't know what you two were doing, but you've got to stop it."

Glaring at him, Nosedive once more tried to move around Duke and was stopped. Getting fed up, he snapped.

"Oh, why? Because I'm too young? Mallory's a big girl. She can decide who she wants to go out with or not."

"Partially," Duke snapped right back. "Six years difference is a lot at your age. And you don't go out with teammates, Nosedive! What happens when you break up? The whole team falls apart."

"What about Lucretia DeCoy? You were plenty eager to go out with her!"

"She wasn't part of this team!"

"So? She could have been, if she wasn't a lying traitor."

"Look, Nosedive," Duke softened his voice, trying to calm both himself and Nosedive down. "You're young and we're trapped here. Don't be desperate just because Tanya and Mallory are the only two girls around. When we get home, you'll have plenty of women fighting to go out with you."

Well, that was offensive. Now he wasn't insulting just Nosedive, but Mallory too. Duke was the one who had taught him honor women and he wasn't going to let him get away with that.

"Mallory isn't some distraction to pass the time until we get back to Puckworld. She's funny and smart and I'd like to see anyone else who can take out a saurian with one punch the way she can. You know what? You're just jealous because I had a date with her and you didn't."

"I didn't say that." Something indiscernible lurked behind the hard gaze Duke was leveling at him.

That's when it hit Nosedive. This wasn't jealousy; it was hurt. Why the older drake was hurting, he didn't know. There was certainly more to this confrontation than he originally thought.

"Look," Duke sighed, showing his own exhaustion. "I wasn't much older than you when my life started to fall apart. I don't want to see you making the same mistakes I did."

"Mallory isn't a mistake."

"Again, didn't say that. But, women can be more trouble than you realize."

"I'll keep that in mind. Can I go to bed now?"

Duke looked uncomfortable for a moment before shaking his head no.

"Never told you why I only have one eye. I think it's time you heard that story."

He studied the dark drake before him for a moment before saying something that surprised even himself.

"Want a cup of coffee?" Clearly, neither one was going to get any rest before practice. They might as well get comfortable before starting what would obviously be a long conversation.

"Yeah," Duke nodded. "But not here. Wing'll be up soon. I know a diner down the street that's open all night and has some good coffee. Come on."

Shaking his head, Nosedive followed Duke to the elevator and outside the Pond for what he knew would be a very enlightening conversation.

0000

Duke led Nosedive to the back booth of a clean, but obviously old diner. Gold specks of glitter were embedded in the white laminate tables. Small cracks in the red, padded booth seats had been covered with clear packing tape, preventing the cracks from pinching unprotected legs. Pies sat in a glass display case on the bar. The red topped stools neatly spaced along the eating counter had clearly seen plenty of use if their dirty bases, ketchup filled grooves, and scuffed tops were any indication. Clean, metal napkin holders, ketchup and mustard bottles, and salt and pepper shakers all stood in their organized regiments at each table.

"Hola," the young woman behind the counter greeted as the two avians chose their booth. She was in her mid to late twenties, dark skinned, with long, black hair pulled neatly back in a ponytail. Her burgundy uniform was clean and orderly. Exhaustion overrode youth's beauty, making her appear far older. A beige wrist brace supported her right hand as she removed a pen and order pad from her apron pocket.

"Hola, Rita," Duke returned. "Como esta?"

"Cansado, pero bueno. Y tu?"

"Sediento."

"Café?"

"Dos, negro." Duke held up two fingers and leaned back, then glanced at Nosedive. "Unless you want something else."

"Dude, I have no idea what you two were saying." Glancing around, he hoped to find a menu, but none were available. "I'll just have a coke."

"Okay." Rita scribbled something on her notepad. "One coke, one coffee?" There was almost no trace of an accent when she spoke English.

"Yeah," Duke confirmed.

"Pie?"

Duke looked at Nosedive, who shook his head and replied in the negative as well.

"You speak Spanish?" Nosedive was curious. He didn't know Duke could speak any other languages.

"Not really. It's close enough to Zabet that I can figure out most of it."

"Cool."

They lapsed into silence as Rita brought them their drinks and vanished into the back. Duke sipped his steaming cup of coffee and studied the blond drake before him. Nosedive, for his part, tried not to fidget with the straw in his glass. Instead, he kept folding and refolding the wrapper before ultimately crumpling it into a little ball and pushing it aside with one finger.

"You gonna tell me what you were doing in Mallory's room tonight?" The question wasn't accusing or demanding.

Nosedive shrugged and took a drink before deciding if he wanted to answer or not. He'd come here expecting to hear about how Duke lost his eye, not be grilled about his activities. Finally deciding he had nothing to hide, he met the expectant, one-eyed gaze.

"We were at a club and some idiot spilled beer all over me. We decided to wash my clothes before I went to bed so Wing wouldn't smell it and think I'd been drinking."

"Were you?"

"No! But," he grinned a little. "Mallory did. She didn't get drunk or anything."

Duke chuckled a little bit and hid his smile behind the coffee cup.

"I bet she didn't. That woman can out drink any drake I've ever met. And that's saying something, considerin who I used to run with."

Now that was an interesting tidbit. Nosedive hadn't really seen Mallory drink before they went out or the occasional glass of wine with dinner. How would Duke know she could out drink anyone?

"So you and Mallory went on a date?" the gray drake prompted.

"Yeah." He couldn't stop the smile that spread across his face. He wanted to blurt out everything that had happened, to share what a great time he'd had; but, it didn't seem right. Instead, he chose to keep quiet.

"Glad to see you two had a good time." Pushing his coffee cup aside, Duke reached into the inside pocket of his maroon jumpsuit and removed a well-worn, thick piece of paper; a small bit of thin, silver chain hung loose between two of his fingers. He studied the paper and whatever the chain was connected to before placing it face down. "Nosedive, you're young. Believe me, I've been where you are now. You think you're invincible and the world is yours. Problem is, learning that you're not can be a very, very hard lesson."

"Tsch! Dude, I know I'm not invincible." Nosedive had seen more than enough in his short life to know how easily the connection to this world could be severed.

"Hm. Ya know, I almost believe you." Duke took a deep breath and half smiled. "And I know what thoughts tend to go runnin around in a seventeen- sorry, eighteen year old's mind when he sees a pretty woman. Course, I was nineteen myself before I got a taste of that."

"We didn't do anything," Nosedive quickly interrupted. "All we did was watch a movie while my clothes were in the wash."

"Yeah, that's where it starts." Sometimes, that smug assurance of his could be so irritating. "Trouble is, you can't know where it'll end."

"Who says it's gotta end?"

Duke shook his head sadly and looked at the paper resting on the table once more before turning it face up and pushing it towards his teammate. It was a photograph, worn and bent at the corners. The colors were still bright, but the image was scratched in a few places. Three young ducks smiled at the camera, their arms around each other's shoulders. What could only be a younger version of Duke was on the right; the gray streak through his hair was unmistakable. He still had both eyes and an unchipped beak. In the middle was a beautiful girl with feathers paler than the snow behind them and wavy, black hair that fell over her shoulders. On the other end stood a tan drake with close-cropped blond hair and a wicked smile. A vividly blue river flowed through the background.

After giving the youth a moment to study the photograph, Duke finished off his coffee in one big gulp and began his story.

"Aiyah Silverdown." Duke spoke the name with reverence usually reserved for a deity. "She was the most beautiful, kind duck I've ever met. Stars. Her feathers were the whitest I've ever seen. I mean, Wing's got pretty white plumage; but, hers? She practically glowed. Put that together with her black hair and you had a beauty artists would kill each other to paint. Had a voice like an angel, too. When she sang Anché'Navia's operas, you just disappeared into the music. Nothing could match her voice." He looked down sadly and gave a half hearted laugh. "Best girl I ever knew. I would, and did, do anything for her.

"We were childhood sweethearts, ya know? We grew up close to each other. My dad was big in the jewel business; hers managed some sort of mining equipment deal. Problem was, when a new regulation or some such went into effect, it about bankrupted her family. They had to move and I thought I'd never see her again. Lucky for me, that voice of hers was her ticket back to the high life."

He leaned forward, elbows resting on the table, and fell quiet for a moment as he played with the now-empty coffee cup. The thin bit of chain still hung between his fingers. Whatever he concealed in his hand was important and he didn't want to let go of it.

Nosedive remained silent, not wanting to interrupt what was obviously a very difficult tale for his friend to tell. He'd always been curious about Duke's past and any previous questioning had been coolly deflected or completely ignored. Part of him felt honored that the older drake had decided to tell him anything; another part was afraid of what he might learn. He looked up to Duke, both as a close friend and mentor. What if Duke told him something that shattered that image of calm control?

"We finally reconnected in college," Duke continued. "My family wasn't too happy bout it. Well, Ma coulda cared less who I went out with. Dierdan," he spat the name as if it were poison, "He was the problem. Bastard had to control everything. Couldn't just be happy for me and let us be. When Aiyah got sick, he wouldn't help. Her family couldn't afford their own rent, much less help with paying for her medicine, but they tried. I couldn't get a raise or a second job, he saw to that." Duke frowned and shook his head, studying the white china in his hands. "You know what it's like to watch someone you love fade away and there's nothing you can do to help them?"

"Yes," Nosedive quietly answered. For ten days, he wasn't sure if Wildwing would best the illness that swept through their prison camp or not. It wasn't a pleasant memory and was something he avoided thinking about whenever possible.

Duke's head shot up and he studied Nosedive for a moment. A corner of his beak twitched upward slightly and he nodded once, recognizing the same pain he had experienced in the much younger duck before him.

"Then you know why I did what I did. A nurse told us about The Miracle Maker. Word was, he could cure anything, for a price. We went to see him. He promised us he could cure Aiyah, in exchange for my eye."

Nosedive couldn't help but stare. What kind of sick freak would require an eye for payment?

"Better close your mouth, kid," he joked. "There was supposed to be some guy who was blind and giving up my eye would be his miracle. An eye ain't much compared to a life, so I did it. Long story short, some things went south and I ended up robbing a bank to pay off the debt." For a moment, it looked like Duke was about to cry, but he quickly regained his composure. "Never shoulda done it," he muttered sadly, studying the object concealed in his hand. "I still ended up loosin' her and went kinda crazy after." Squeezing his eyes shut, he gripped whatever was in his hand tighter. "Not much point ta staying straight when ya got nothin' ta live for."

"Whoa…" Nosedive didn't know what to say. How could someone go through all that and come out with Duke's grace?

Duke sharply tapped the coffee cup on the saucer twice. Rita quickly reappeared, coffee pot in hand.

"Need a refill?" the waitress asked, pointing to the half full glass of coke.

"No, thanks," Nosedive declined. He really wasn't that thirsty anyway.

As she refilled Duke's mug, she smiled at the photograph.

"You?" She pointed to the younger Duke. When he nodded, she continued to study the photo. "She's pretty. Your friends?"

"Mi esposa y mi hermano de espada," he clarified.

"Oh!" Quickly glancing between Duke and the photo, her face fell. "Lo siento." Gently squeezing his shoulder, she once more retreated to the back.

"Esposa?" Nosedive questioned. That word sounded an awful lot like spouse.

"Yeah," Duke nodded. Opening his hand, he spread out the chain and pendant he'd been holding, laying them out on the table.

Picking it up, Nosedive was surprised to discover it was a sarang, Puckworld's version of wedding rings. The silver chain was thin and delicate. What looked like half of a watch face made up the pendant. Bright yellow powder floated between the crystal and faded, warped numbers. An inscription on the back read: Duke Lemieux & Aiyah Silverdown, 18 Octen 3051, Veri Dicetur.

"Lemieux?" That wasn't right. Duke's last name was L'Orange.

"Hm." Duke half nodded, half growled. "Wasn't always L'Orange. Took that name after my family disowned me."

Suddenly, Duke's animosity towards Claude Lemieux whenever they played against the Colorado Snow Beasts made a little more sense.

"What's Veri Dicetur mean?"

"It's Anchénian for truth will be told. It was sorta my family's motto."

Raising an eyebrow, Nosedive handed the sarang back to his friend. The thin chain and delicate font used for the inscription told him this had been Aiyah's. He'd never seen Duke wear one, but that didn't mean he didn't still have it.

"I had no idea." Nosedive wished there was some way to offer his friend comfort, but these wounds were clearly ones that could never heal.

"See?" Duke half smiled. "Told ya, women are trouble. It all starts out passion and romance and promises of undying love; but, you've got no way of knowing where it'll take ya."

Even after learning the truth about Duke's past, Nosedive couldn't bring himself to believe that was how all romance ended. His parents had been happily married for many years before the invasion. Assuming they had survived, he knew they would still be together.

"Just because that's what happened to you, doesn't mean it'll happen to me."

"No, it doesn't," he agreed, sipping his cooling beverage once more. "But, I hope it put things in perspective for ya. I don't want to see you following the same path I did."

"And you think Mallory's going to lead me into a life of crime?" The very idea was ridiculous! If there was anyone on the team who was more against skirting the law than Wildwing, it was Mallory.

"Nosedive," Duke sighed and shook his head, disappointment etched in his tired eye. "Didn't you hear anything I just said?"

"Duh! I've been sitting right in front of you this whole time."

"Then you weren't listening very well."

"No, I did. And it sucks. I know exactly what it's like to loose someone you're that close to. It hurts like hell and you'll never get that piece of you back they took with them. But that doesn't mean I should avoid everyone because they might die."

"Nosedive!" Duke growled his name. "Because of Aiyah, I lost my eye, my family, my dignity, my life. I. Lost. Everything."

"So you're saying you should have let her die from whatever illness she had instead of going to The Miracle Maker?"

"No," Duke refused. "I'd do it all again if it meant I could have five more minutes with her. I just want you to understand that love can make you do stupid things that you never thought you were capable of."

"Yeah, I get that, Duke. And you don't have to worry about any of that with me and Mallory."

"Oh?" Finally, Duke accepted the calm manner in which Nosedive assured him of the lack of risk he and Mallory faced.

A beeping from Nosedive's comm interrupted them. Flipping it open, he found the haggard, exhausted face of his brother.

"Nosedive!" Wildwing looked relieved that he had answered. "Where are you?"

"At a diner with Duke. Bro, you look awful! What happened?"

"Bad night," he brushed off the concern. "You going to be ready for morning skate in an hour?"

"Yeah." He tried to stifle a yawn and failed. "We'll be there soon."

"Good. See you there." With that, the screen went black.

"Guess we'd better head back." Reaching for his wallet, Nosedive retrieved a ten and set it on the table, figuring it would be enough to cover both drinks and a tip.

"Yeah. Didn't realize how late it was." Duke picked up his photo and sarang to return them to the safety of his pocket.

"Don't you mean early?"

"Same thing." Pulling out his wallet, he folded two hundred dollar bills in half and slid them under the near-empty coffee cup.

"Whoa, nice tip."

"She needs it."

"I'm actually kind of glad you caught us tonight," Nosedive grinned mischievously.

"Oh?"

"Yeah! It'd be kind of weird asking you to help me buy a ring if you didn't know."

"Wait. What?" Duke stared wide eyed at the youth before him, completely shocked at what was being implied.

"Keep your eye patch on," Nosedive laughed. "I'll tell you exactly what Mallory and I have planned on our way back to the Pond."

"You'd better have one hell of an explanation," the gray drake demanded.

"You bet I do, buddy boy. You bet I do."

* * *

**End AN:** The songs played by Gaelic Storm at the pub are _Hills of Connemara_ and _Bell of Belfast City, _two traditional Irish tunes. Gaelic Storm is a real band that formed in southern California in 1996 and gained fame as the band playing in the third class cabins on the Titanic movie.

Next week, things start to get really, really interesting!


	4. The Ring

**AN:** Well, this is another short chapter. I decided to go ahead and upload this now because the story is supposed to be taking place in real time. Who's excited for tomorrow's update?

* * *

**March 24, 1997**

"That one looks nice." Nosedive casually pointed to a square cut amethyst ring in the glass case before him.

"Nah," Duke shook his head, immediately dismissing the jewelry.

"What? She wears a lot of purple. I think it'd look good on her."

"Emerald would be better. You want something that's going to stand out, not blend in."

"Afternoon," a suavely groomed gentleman stepped up to the counter to help them. A small, gold name tag told them his name was Carlo. His short, dark hair was slicked back. The perfectly trimmed mustache hiding under his nose was pencil thin. Despite the tailored cut and obvious expense of the dark suit he wore, it was the diamond encrusted ring that perched on his little finger that drew attention to itself. An expensive gold watch peeked out from under his shirt sleeve. "How can I help you?"

"Just casing the place," Duke joked, casually leaning on the counter and studying the many necklaces, bracelets, and rings held within. The open-mouthed stare he received was exactly the reaction he'd hoped to elicit.

"Can I see that one?" Nosedive asked, pointing to the amethyst ring. He did it more to draw attention away from Duke than from any real desire to see that particular ring.

"Certainly." After unlocking the case and removing the ring, he handed it to Nosedive. Half his attention was kept focused on Duke, who he obviously wasn't sure if he should trust or not.

"Nice." He nodded a little as he held it up to the light, appreciating the shine.

"Telling ya, amethyst's not her stone." The gray drake didn't even bother to look at the ring; instead, he continued to focus on the other jewelry in front of him.

"If I may," Carlo broke in. "What is her complexion?"

"Um…" Nosedive had never really considered that.

"Spring," Duke filled in for him. He knew they didn't really want to give a name and, technically, either girl could be a spring in complexion.

"Ah," Carlo nodded. "The amethyst would be good, but this one is too light." He replaced the ring Nosedive handed back to him and guided them to another case. The amethysts in this one were rougher cut and much darker in color, more of a deep violet than pale lavender.

Nosedive made a face at them. Somehow, they just didn't seem right. Nothing in there really caught his eye. Looking around some more, he spotted deep red gems. A little sign proclaimed they were garnets. Some of the gems were such a dark red they bordered on black.

"What about these?"

Duke glanced at them and frowned. He crouched down, staring intently at the jewelry, clearly not pleased with what he was seeing. Moving back and tilting his head a little, he focused very intently on a pair of earrings. After a moment, he stood and shook his head.

"Come on, Nosedive. We'll try somewhere else."

"What?" The blond drake was extremely confused by Duke's sudden dismissal of everything in the store.

Carlo narrowed his eyes and stared intently at Duke, his posture tense. After a moment, he huffed and turned his back on them, clearly insulted.

"You don't want to buy anything where they're trying to pass off glass as garnets."

"I never!" Carlo turned around to cast a death glare at the former jewel thief. "Everything in here is of the highest quality. I assure you, there is no glass in here other than the cases."

"Really?" Duke crossed his arms and met the indignant human's gaze. "Prove it."

Almost angrily, Carlo immediately unlocked the case and pulled out the earrings Duke had studied so intently. Retrieving a small, pen shaped tester from the inside pocket of his suit jacket, he touched the tip to the earrings. A series of lights lit up from red to yellow and one light into the green.

"See?" Carlo proudly showed. "Two. Glass does not have such a high reflective index."

"Yeah." Duke nodded before taking a step closer. Reaching into one of the pouches on his shoulder, he retrieved a small magnet. Holding it an inch away from the metal edging of the case, he let go and it flew to the metal, gripping tightly. Satisfied that he had demonstrated the strength of the magnet, he pried it free and held it next to the earring Carlo had just tested. The stone remained motionless, not moving from the glass surface on which it rested.

The human stared at the gem, expecting it to move. His brow furrowed as Duke gradually closed the gap between gem and magnet with no sign of movement. Frustrated, he nudged Duke's hand, forcing the blood-red stone to touch the magnet. Duke lightly pulled the magnet away and the gem remained on the glass surface, unmoved.

"Last time I checked," Duke smoothly reminded, "Garnets were magnetic."

Carlo gaped open-mouthed at the stone, then the duck, then the stone once more. Banishing the astonishment from his face, he managed to regain his composure and stood straight.

"How could you tell, just by looking?" the clerk demanded to know.

"I've got my ways," Duke shrugged. "Come on, Dive. There'r a few other places I'd like to look."

With that, the two ducks exited, leaving behind a very stunned employee.

0000

"Seriously?" Nosedive scoffed at the Pepto Bismol hued building Duke had brought him to. He'd finally agreed to let Duke pick their next store after coming up empty for two hours. "You want me to buy a ring here?" Ornate wrought iron covered the windows, slightly obscuring the neon sign that declared Dave & Diane's Jewelry and Pawnbrokers open.

"Can't hurt to look." He opened the bar-covered glass door and stood aside for Nosedive to enter before him.

The inside wasn't exactly what Nosedive had expected. He hadn't been in many pawnshops before; none, to be exact. Movies and TV shows always portrayed pawn shops as dark, cluttered, and full of junk. The clerk was supposed to be fat, unshaven, odoriferous and nefarious. If the media had any credibility, and Nosedive knew that was doubtful, this was where criminals brought stolen goods to get a quick buck. Then again, it was a former criminal bringing him here.

"Hey, Dave!" Duke greeted as he paused by the baby gate near the back of the store and reached over to pet the overly excited poodle mix. "Yeah, nice to see you too, Penny."

"Duke!" Wrinkles appeared at the corner's of his eyes as the lone human behind the counter smiled. "Been a while since I've seen you around. The only sword I have right now's that cheap China crap all the anime kids keep buying."

"Ah, that's okay." Duke and Dave shook hands. Throwing a nod towards Nosedive, he made introductions. "This here's Nosedive, our left wing. He's lookin' ta buy a ring, if ya catch my drift. Dive, meet Dave, one of the best pawnbrokers this side of the Rockies."

"Pleasure," Nosedive greeted as he too shook the meaty hand offered to him. The neatly laid out jewelry in waist high, glass cases may have been their main objective for coming here but the wall of VHS, DVD's, CD's, and books was demanding at least a little of his attention. Beanie Babies stuffed in random corners were nothing more than a distraction from the orderly shelves.

"Engagement rings are over here." Dave directed them to the case next to the baby gate and quietly whining dog. "Who's the lucky lady?"

Resting his elbows on the glass, Nosedive inspected yet another grouping of rings. "We're keeping that quiet until the wedding announcement," he said. Nothing really stood out to him. They were all diamonds in various cuts and sizes; pretty, but ultimately nothing special.

"Don't lean on the glass," Duke muttered, gently pulling his shoulder back. "It's rude."

Nosedive stared at him in confusion. Duke had been leaning on the counters at just about every jewelry store they'd been to! Nevertheless, he took a step back and removed his arms from the case.

"Hey, Dave, got anything you haven't put out yet?"

"Yeah…" Biting his lips, the sandy haired human looked down, not really seeing the assortment of rings and bracelets before him. Fingers tapping on the metal edged case, he thought. "Ricki hasn't been in for a couple weeks, so I've got quite a bit that needs to be appraised. You can go through that if you want." Turning, he vanished into a back office.

"Sure you don't want a sarang?" Duke asked his teammate while they waited.

"Yeah." An emerald ring the next case over caught Nosedive's attention. "We need something humans will understand. Rings seem to be a pretty big deal." Smiling deviously, he continued. "Besides, I could always get her a sarang when we get back to Puckworld."

"Yeah, just keep thinkin' that."

"Here we go," Dave announced as he set two black boxes on the counter. Removing the locking lids, he reveled several pieces of jewelry and watches. Each case had velvet lined dividers to separate rings from bracelets from necklaces from earrings.

"Not bad." Duke nodded appreciatively as he selected a ruby necklace. Removing a jewelers loop from his pocket, he inspected it closer.

"Find anything you want a closer look at?" Dave asked, moving closer to Nosedive.

"Yeah. Can I see that one?" He pointed to a gold ring with a green stone flanked by two blue ones.

"Ah, a very nice ring," Dave agreed, unlocking the case and removing the requested jewelry.

Nosedive held it up for a better look. Light sparkled off the vibrant green rock. He was beginning to see why Duke liked gems so much, not that he'd take to collecting them himself or anything.

"Hey, Duke. What do you think about this one?" He held it out for the gray drake's approval.

Duke carefully considered the emerald ring before him. The deep green of the pear-cut stone shone brilliantly in the gold setting. Two round topaz added their blue tone to the beauty of the piece. The color combination was beautiful, but Duke still shook his head in disgust and rejected the piece.

"Whoever cut this was was so incompetent they couldn't cut the cheese if they ate a pound of beans. Idiot shoulda cut that stone in a marquis."

"Um… Okay?" Shrugging, he handed it back to Dave. "Guess not."

"Don't let that old pirate make all your decisions for you," Dave joked. "If you like it, and if you think she'll like it, then ignore him."

"He know's what he's talking about." Nosedive didn't want to go into any detail about how Duke knew so much about gems. Still, he knew Mallory would go straight to the former jewel thief for his opinion on the ring and quality of the stone. It was better to get something he knew Duke would approve of than to disregard the expert's advice and get yelled at for it later.

Moving next to Duke, Nosedive looked through the box of unpriced jewelry. His eye was instantly drawn to an open style ring. The thin, gold band curved around itself rather than connecting into a circle. Delicate, square cut emeralds nestled into the gold in a solid stripe. When Mallory wore the ring, it would give the illusion of being two.

"This one." He knew it. Mallory would _love_ this ring. It was every bit as unique as she.

"Whoa." An unmistakable look of approval settled over Duke's face as he took the piece from Nosedive. "I think we found it." Humming positively, he studied the gems with his jewelers loop and set the ring down. "Still, can't hurt to keep looking."

"What size do you need?" Dave asked, pulling out a metal pole with measurements etched into it. The tapered tip grew thicker at the base, allowing any number of ring sizes to be gaged.

"Um…" Suddenly, Nosedive realized exactly what he had forgotten to find out before leaving this morning.

"Don't know, do ya?" Duke smirked.

"Small?" Nosedive offered hopefully.

"Figured as much." Reaching into his interior pocket, Duke removed one of Mallory's power gloves. She almost always wore the purple, fingerless glove on her right hand. Small electrodes embedded in the back of it helped increase her punching strength.

"Dude, she's going to kill you if she finds out you've been messing with her gear!" He hated to admit it, but Duke's idea had been a good one.

"So? Never stopped you from screwing around with her shoulder pads or skates." He turned his attention back to the pawnbroker. "Mind if I see that?" he asked, motioning to the mandrel. When Dave handed it over, he slid the glove over it and pinched the ring finger at the appropriate spot. Lifting the fabric up with his other hand, he double checked the numbers. "Right hand's a five, so we'll need a four."

"Not a five?" Nosedive was confused. "Won't that be too small?"

"She's right winged. Off hand's always a size smaller. Unless," he chuckled lightly, "you're ambidextrous. My hands are the same size."

Dave took the mandrel back and slid the ring over it. Graying eyebrows shot up in surprise. "It's actually a five."

"Good." Duke continued to look through the two boxes of jewelry in front of him, dismissing the potential engagement ring. "Can't really size somethin' like that too much. How fast can ya get it done?"

"I could have it in about two weeks. Ricki's on a mission trip in Costa Rica and won't be back until next week. He's the guy who does my appraising and sizing."

"I need it quicker than that." Nosedive had a tight schedule to keep and there was no way he was going to let sizing the ring throw a wrench in his plans.

"Could always give it ta her now and get it sized later," Duke suggested.

"How much?" That was the ultimate question. He hoped it wouldn't be nearly as expensive as what they'd looked at in the jewelry stores. Some of those rings cost as much as he made in three games combined.

"Well, seeing as how Ricki hasn't appraised it yet…" Dave trailed off in thought. "I know Duke's an honest guy. What'd you offer?"

"Eight." He didn't even look away from the sapphire bracelet he currently held.

"That seems kind of low." Dave rubbed his two chins. "I supposed I could go fifteen."

Fifteen thousand? Nosedive frowned. He could afford it, but it seemed absolutely insane to spend that much money on what was essentially a rock.

"How bout ten?" Duke finally looked up from the small pile he had separated from the selection Dave had brought out.

"Not sure I can go that low without Ricki taking a look at it," Dave pondered.

"Twelve?" Nosedive offered. It hurt to offer that much, but it was better than fifteen thousand.

"You birds drive a hard bargain," Dave considered. "But, I'll go twelve hundred. How would you like to pay?"

Nosedive's jaw dropped in surprise. Twelve hundred? That was nothing compared to what they'd been looking at earlier! Heck, he almost made that much off one of Phil's stupid publicity stunts. "It's not stolen, is it?" The words left his beak before he realized he'd said them. Face heating in embarrassment, he tried to play it cool.

Duke burst out laughing the moment he saw the small feathers around Nosedive's face fluff out. "Don't worry, kid. Only idiots bring stolen stuff ta pawn shops. Too easy ta track."

"Um, cash, I guess." Nosedive pulled out his wallet. Finally, they had found the right ring.

"I'll take these." Duke gestured to the sapphire bracelet, ruby necklace, and diamond cuff links he'd set aside.

Nosedive browsed the movies and music while Duke and Dave haggled some more over the unpriced jewelry. He had no idea what Duke was going to do with the necklace and bracelet. Who was he to question a former jewel thief about what gems he actually purchased?

"So," Duke clapped a hand on Nosedive's shoulder as they left the store, purchases in hand. "Ya ready for the big question?"

"I guess." Nosedive swallowed around the unexpected nervousness dancing around in his stomach. Somehow, he hadn't expected to be so anxious about it.

"Better be more sure than that when ya ask her," Duke admonished. Storing the bag of jewelry under the seat of the duckcycle, he tried to sooth the teen. "Relax, she's not gonna bite your head off. We're ducks, not praying mantis'! Sides, worst she could do is say no, right?"

"Thanks, Duke." Nosedive rolled his eyes and buckled his helmet in place.

Together, they sped off towards the Pond to begin preparations for the big question.

* * *

**End AN:** Garnets really are magnetic! I have some and double checked with a neodymium magnet. You can tell a real garnet from a fake just by looking. It requires a bright light and the proper angle, but garnets will only reflect one rainbow and will have a distinctive green band and a very thin yellow band. This site explains it better: facetingacademyDOTcom/learn-faceting/learn-faceting-free/gem-identification/

If you want to see the ring they ended up buying, check out bkgjewelryDOTcom/emerald-rings/573-18k-yellow-gold-emerald-ringDOThtml


	5. The Question

**AN:** Oh, my goodness. I think I'm going to die from laughter here… I have no shame.

By the way, there was a short update yesterday. You might want to go back a chapter if you missed Duke and Nosedive shopping.

* * *

**March 25, 1997**

Morning practice had been rough, but it wasn't anything Mallory wasn't used to. She was more than ready to have the afternoon to herself. Providing Dragaunus stayed quiet, she was going to enjoy a full day of pampering. A bubble bath, glass of wine, lounging around in her quarters wearing nothing more than her favorite bath robe, and watching cheesy chick flicks sounded like heaven.

Her quarters were supposed to be neatly arranged and immaculately tidy. Everything had a place and everything was always in its place. The box of chocolates, DVD, and bouquet of red roses on her coffee table did not belong there. Annoyance ticked at her fist. Someone had dared enter without her permission; but, they left gifts. Whoever had done it had left chocolate and flowers. They could be forgiven, after being properly warned to never do it again.

Smiling to herself, she picked up the DVD and opened it to find a slip of paper covered in Nosedive's nearly illegible scrawl. After several attempts, she finally figured out that he was asking her to watch the movie and then meet him at the Castle Inn and Suites at one. There was something about porces, horses, or lords, but she really couldn't figure it out. He seriously needed to work on his penmanship.

Deciding she had nothing to loose, Mallory moved the vase of roses to her nightstand and put the movie in. A human boy, coughing and playing a baseball video game, appeared on the screen. She watched with interest as his mother entered the room and introduced the grandfather. The grandfather sat down to read a book to the little boy. Selecting a chocolate covered coconut chew, Mallory watched as Peter Falk began telling the tale of the Princess Bride.

Her plans for the afternoon could wait. It looked like Nosedive was up to something good and she was itching to figure out what it was.

0000

Mallory stared at the Castle Inn and Suites. What was Nosedive planning? This place was some sort of tourist trap hotel for people visiting Disneyland. Staircases designed to look like castle towers rose four stories up and pennants intended to look medieval hung from iron railings along the covered walkways. Rolling her eyes at his eccentricity, she entered the hotel. The inside was just as movie-set stylized medieval as the exterior, with flagstone flooring and a gigantic chair setting next to the check in counter. Thank the stars Phil hadn't booked them to stay anywhere like this on one of their road trips; she didn't think she could handle all the children running around and begging for more candy or crying that they wanted to go swimming.

Nosedive hadn't given very clear instructions on where to go from here. Or, if he had, she hadn't been able to make them out. Sighing, she sat on one of the red couches and tried to hide. The blond girl behind the check in counter smiled at her and waved. Mallory gave a half hearted wave back and let her had flop to the couch. If Nosedive didn't show up soon, she was going to shove those roses right down his throat. She checked her watch- five minutes late.

Frustrated, Mallory leaned back and waited. A few kids asked for autographs, which she willingly gave. Requests for photos were declined. Even if Nosedive wasn't around, she wasn't in the mood for people to be taking her picture. After another five minutes had passed, she stormed to the check in counter.

"Do you know anything about why I'm supposed to be here?" she questioned, hoping beyond hope that they weren't as brain dead as their surroundings suggested.

"Yes!" The blond who had waved earlier cheerfully held up what looked like a skeleton key. A tag reading 245 hung from the end. "Here's your key."

The glare Mallory gave the clerk had been known to make two hundred pound men run in fear. Something must not have been right in the girls brain; she just sat there with that cheesy smile on her face. Maybe it was because she was blond. Blond's didn't seem to do much other than smile and act stupid, if Nosedive was any indication. She knew she was allowing a stereotype to cloud her judgment but didn't really care at the moment.

"Then why didn't you tell me earlier?" she growled as she snatched the key.

"You seemed pretty comfortable over there."

Rolling her eyes, Mallory started up the winding staircase and followed the signs to room 245. Nosedive had better be planning something good. Otherwise, he was going to seriously pay for ruining her perfectly planned afternoon.

As Mallory entered the room, she saw Nosedive, dressed completely in black, laying casually on the queen sized poster bed. The left shoulder of his billowy pirate shirt was torn and his hair had once more been pulled back in a tidy ponytail. A fencing foil lay next to him.

"Oh, hell no!" She practically slammed the door shut behind her. She launched into a tirade as she stormed to the bed. "If you think for a moment that we're going to—"

"Gently!" Nosedive interrupted, eyes wide.

"I'll show you gentle, you little punk!" Clenching her hand into a fist, she threatened to knock some sense into him.

"Wait, wait, wait!" He rolled onto the floor, dodging the bruising blow. "Just, go with me on this one, okay?"

"Go with you?" Was he insane?

"Yeah." Gently grabbing her wrists, he guided her to the bed. "Just, sit there, okay?" He retrieved a silver crown from the pillow next to where he'd been laying and carefully set it on her head. Trusting she wouldn't try punching him again, he lay down on the bed and gulped nervously. Finally regaining his composure, he delivered a line that would most likely get him killed. "There's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. Twould be a pity to damage yours."

Mallory gaped at him, mouth open and eyes wide, shocked beyond words.

"Uh… Hehe?" Nervously smiling, he continued. "Let's just skip ahead." Raising his voice a little, he clearly enunciated the next phrase. "You didn't say it, you didn't do it. Wouldn't you agree, your highness?"

The door opened, causing a frowning Mallory to glance behind her. A man dressed in one of the most ridiculous blue outfits she'd ever seen entered; he really didn't have the right kind of legs to pull off wearing tights. His curly, brown hair was obviously a wig.

"A technicality that will shortly be remedied," he deadpanned. Pulling a sword from his side, he continued with a little more vigor. "But first things first!" Throwing the scabbard to the ground, he struck an en guarde position.

Suddenly, Mallory realized exactly what was going on. All irritation and anger vanished as tried not to laugh.

"To the death," the human promised.

"No!" Nosedive growled, getting into character. "To the pain."

"I don't think I'm quite familiar with that phrase."

"I'll explain. And I'll use small words that you'll be sure to understand you warthog faced buffoon."

"That may be the first time in my life a man has dared insult me."

Mallory had to give him credit. The costume may be on the shoddy side, but his acting was spot on.

"It won't be the last," Nosedive promised. "To the pain means the first thing you loose will be your feet below the ankles, then your hands at the wrists. Next, your nose."

"And then my tongue, I suppose. I killed you too quickly the last time, a mistake I don't intend to duplicate tonight." He threateningly stepped closer.

If Mallory hadn't figured out what was going on, she'd probably have knocked the guy out with a single blow the moment he drew the sword. As it was, she was enjoying the little show. Besides, it was nice playing the princess for a change.

"I wasn't finished!" the black shirted duck spat. "The next thing you loose will be your left eye followed by your right."

"And then my ears. I understand. Let's get on with it."

"Wrong! Your ears you keep and I'll tell you why. So that every shriek of every child at seeing your hideousness will be yours to cherish. Every babe that weeps at your approach, every woman that cries 'Dear God, what is that thing?,' will echo in your perfect ears. That is what to the pain means. It means I leave you in anguish. Leaving you to wallow in freakish misery forever."

"I think you're bluffing."

"It's possible, pig. I might be bluffing. It's conceivable, you miserable, vomitous, mass, that I'm only lying here because I lack the strength to stand. Then again, perhaps I have the strength after all." Dramatically, Nosedive pushed himself up, grabbing his sword in the process. Rising to his full height, he pointed the blade at their Humperdinck impersonator. "Drop. Your. Sword."

The blade fell to the carpeted floor with a dull thud.

"Have a seat," the blond drake directed, motioning to a padded office chair.

Rushing into the seat as if his very life depended on it, he quickly sat. He gripped the chair arms tightly, feigning fear.

"Tie him up."

Mallory couldn't help but smirk at the rope conveniently sitting on a table next to the chair. Accepting her role as Princess Buttercup, she began looping it around his wrists.

"Make it as tight as you wish," Nosedive imperiously declared.

Mallory gave the rope a short tug, eliciting a grunted _oof_ from their psudo-villain.

Suddenly, Duke came running in the open door, one hand wrapped around his side and the other holding his saber.

"Where's Fezzik?" the one eyed drake questioned, pretending to be out of breath.

"I thought he was with you."

"No."

"In that case," Nosedive tried to take a step forward, using the sword as a cane. He dramatically fell to the side, catching himself on the edge of the bed before pushing himself upright.

"Help him," Duke directed, gesturing towards Nosedive with his sword.

"He needs all the help he can get," Mallory laughed before regaining her composure. What was the line? She couldn't remember it exactly. Oh well, close enough should be good enough. "Why does he need help?"

"Because he has no strength." Duke did a very passable Spanish accent, rolling the r in _strength_ perfectly.

Mallory couldn't believe she was actually playing along, but she went ahead and grabbed Nosedive's arm, slinging it over her shoulder.

He hugged her close, giving her shoulder a light squeeze.

"I knew it!" The supposed-prince broke in. "I knew he was bluffing."

"Shall I dispatch him for you?" Duke held his sword under Humperdinck's chin, eager to deliver a killing blow.

"No," Nosedive refused. "Whatever happens to us, I want him to live a long life with his cowardice."

Duke took a step back towards the open window.

"Inigo!" a deep voice called from outside. "Inigo! Where are you?"

Mallory glanced towards the window. Was Grin involved in this too? Then again, that voice hadn't been quite right. She and Nosedive took the five steps to the window, him still leaning on her, and looked out.

"There you are." A very muscular man stood in the parking lot with four horses, two white, one brown, and one paint. All four horses wore saddles and bridles. "I was in the prince's stables and, there they were. Four white horses. And I thought, there are four of us, if we ever find the lady. Hello lady!"

"Hello!" Mallory laughed and waved. "You're color blind. Only two of them are white."

"So, I took them with me, in case we ever bumped into each other. I guess we just did."

"Fezzik," Duke called out. "You did something right."

"Don't worry," the human replied. "I won't let it go to my head."

Smiling, Nosedive sat on the window ledge and gestured for Mallory to climb over.

"If you think I'm jumping out of that window, you're crazy." The little show had been entertaining, but she wasn't about to trust some muscle bound stable hand to catch her.

"Don't need to." Nosedive finally broke character and pointed to a rope tied to the balcony above them. "There's a rope."

"Fine." Grabbing the rope, Mallory easily lifted herself out the window and slid to the ground below. Nosedive followed right after her. "So, what's this? The ride into the sunset?" She glanced to where Duke was untying the rope and scaling the face of the building without any sort of safety. Damned thief was going to get himself killed for some silly skit.

"Sort of." Nosedive took something from the guy holding the horses and knelt in front of her on one knee. Opening a black, velvet box, he showed her an exquisite emerald ring. "Mallory McMallard, will you be my princess bride?"

He had left her speechless for the second time that day. This whole thing had been some elaborate proposal? No words would come out, so she extended her left hand and nodded eagerly.

He slid the ring onto her finger and quickly stood, hugging her tightly.

"Nosedive," she laughed, "You're the most insane drake I've ever met."

"I know."

"So, how about that ride into the sunset?" 'Fezzik' asked.

"You mean, we're actually going riding?"

"Yup!" Duke took the reins and easily swung into the saddle of the brown horse. "Not done yet, sweetheart."

"Okay…"

"This one's yours." Fezzik guided her to one of the white horses. "Her name's Star and she's as tame as anything. You don't have to worry about her throwing you."

"How do I even get up on this thing?" Mallory was a soldier, not a cowgirl. She'd never been on the back of a horse in her life and didn't have the first clue what to do.

After a little explanation and a couple of attempts, Fezzik got her into the saddle and assisted Nosedive onto his white horse. Thankfully, the horses seemed to want to follow each other. As Fezzik headed towards the road, Star automatically followed without being told.

Mallory let her mind wander as they rode down the busy sidewalk, crossed a street, and entered the Disney theme park. She hadn't suspected Nosedive would go so far in his proposal. This had to be one of the most elaborate set ups she'd ever heard about. One of her friends had been proposed to in a hot air balloon, but this blew that story right out of the water. She glanced down to the emerald ring wrapped around her left ring finger and smiled. That was one fine ring he'd picked out.

* * *

**End AN: **Had enough yet? No? Good! Next week: the exciting conclusion!


	6. The Announcement

**AN: **Here you go, the exciting conclusion! Please don't hate me…

* * *

**The Anaheim Gazette**

**Lovebirds Secretly Married**

_Mallory McMallard and Nosedive Flashblade were united in marriage on Monday, March 31, 1997 at half past four o'clock at City Hall in Anaheim, California. The ceremony was officiated by Justice of the Peace Paul D. Uhlar._

_The bride is the daughter of Margaret and Bardon McMallard of Puckworld. The groom is the son of Duffey and Mareena Flashblade of Puckworld._

_The bride wore a strapless Sottero and Midgley gown of ivory satin. The gown featured dazzling faceted beads and pearls on the bust, cascading to a gorgeous crocheted scalloped lace over a Sinatra Satin sheath. She carried a bouquet of white roses._

_No reception was held. Instead, a short interview was given. Please see continuation on page 15C for the interview. No honeymoon is planned and the couple will reside in Anaheim, California._

_The bride is a Sergent First Class in the Puckworld Special Forces. She is currently employed as the right wing for the Anaheim Mighty Ducks._

_The bridegroom is the left wing for the Anaheim Mighty Ducks._

0000

Wildwing frowned at the empty bunk above his as he finished getting dressed. Nosedive had vanished again yesterday afternoon and not returned last night. Considering this was the second time in as many weeks that his brother had pulled such a stunt, Wildwing was getting worried. It wasn't like Nosedive to run off without telling him what was going on.

Grabbing the black notebook that held the team schedule, he left for breakfast. Tonight was the final game against the Black Cats and he'd given them the eight o'clock morning skate. It was just one more way to work the game in his favor; Nosedive always played better if he had the opportunity to sleep in a bit. That is, he would if he'd actually gotten any sleep last night…

Duke, Tanya, and Grin were already sitting at the table when he entered the galley. The newspaper was spread out in front of Duke and the gray drake casually scanned it while sipping a cup of coffee.

"Morn-" Tanya's greeting was interrupted by a forceful sneeze. She threw a dirty look at the bouquet of white roses sitting in the middle of the table.

"Morning." Pouring himself a cup of coffee, he started making some toast and yogurt with sliced bananas. "Anybody seen Nosedive?"

"Not since yesterday." Duke carefully folded the newspaper and set it aside.

"Something is amiss with our little friend," Grin said, frowning. "He has been too secretive lately."

"Got that right." The leader frowned again as he spread peanut butter on his toast. He was pondering what to do exactly when Nosedive casually walked in, grabbed a box of cereal and bowl, and sat down as if today were just any other day. "Where have you been?" Wildwing tried to keep the worry and annoyance out of his voice, but knew Nosedive would pick up on it anyway.

"Chill, bro. I've been around." He tried to suppress a smile while adding milk to his Fruity Pebbles.

"Nosedive," Mallory sweetly called as she entered. "You left this on the night stand." She handed him his wrist com and gave his shoulder a light squeeze before grabbing a bowl and pouring herself some Fruity Pebbles. An emerald ring on her left hand sparkled in the galley light. She kept twisting it around, getting used to the feeling of a ring on that hand.

Left his com on the night stand? Wildwing's eyes widened at the implication. What was Nosedive doing in her room that he left the com on her night stand?

"Nosedive! Mallory!" Phil burst into the room angrily. His tie hung crooked around his neck and his shoes didn't match. "You two owe me a ton of money! How could you do this to me?" He despairingly waved a newspaper around. "All that publicity, wasted."

"What's going on?" Wildwing demanded. "Nosedive, you'd better have a good excuse for where you were last night."

"He was with me." Mallory calmly sipped her glass of water, completely unphased by Phil's attitude or Wildwing's ire.

"What!" The leader's voice cracked in shock.

"I thought it was pretty normal to sleep in the same room as your wife." Nosedive put his arm around Mallory's shoulder and pulled her close. "Wildwing-"

"WIFE?!"

"I wish he was lying," Phil moaned, throwing the newspaper to the table. Right on the front page was a large picture of Nosedive and Mallory, arms around each other and looking deeply into their partner's eyes. Right above the photo, in big bold print, were the words _Lovebirds Secretly Married_. Grabbing the papers, he quickly scanned the wedding announcement.

Wildwing didn't know what to do. He kept looking from the newspaper in his hand to his offensive line. Anger, confusion, and disappointment danced wildly across his face. Finally, he sighed and set the paper down. A small line appeared between his eyebrows as he again looked from Nosedive to Mallory and back.

"You two," Phil continued to rant, "Owe me big. You're going to be doing interviews and public appearances nonstop for the next week. How could you get married and deny your adoring public the joy of a big wedding?"

"Wait a minute." Tanya massaged her eyes under her glasses as she thought. "_Nosedive_ and Mallory? Huh! Now I've heard it all."

"I wish you two great happiness." Grin appeared ever bit as perplexed as anyone else but quickly regained his composure.

"Thank you, Grin." Mallory smiled at Tanya, "I brought the bouquet back for you since you weren't there to catch it."

"Hah!" Tanya pointed to the flowers on the table as she leaned forward. "Nosedive's got you under some sort of mind control if you think I'm getting married next. No way."

"Congratulations, Mallory." Duke raised his coffee mug in a toast. "Nosedive, good luck." He ceremoniously took a big drink and settled back to watch the show.

"You going to say something, Wing?" Nosedive looked up hopefully at his big brother.

"Yeah," Mallory added. "I was sort of hoping you'd welcome me to the family."

"You didn't want me there?" Wildwing had finally settled on hurt. He'd thought they were closer than this. Nosedive had always told him everything. How could he keep something this big a secret? Why wouldn't he tell him about dating Mallory?

Nosedive's and Mallory's smiles quickly vanished. The redhead looked to the roses on the table to avoid the pained stare of her brother-in-law. Nosedive leaned over and took the newspaper from Duke. Seeing that it was already folded to the right page, he thrust it towards Wildwing.

"I think you should read the interview." He shook the paper a little to emphasize his point.

"I thought you'd want me to be your best drake." He automatically took the newspaper and stared at the words, unable to comprehend what was in front of him. Shaking his head, he set the paper down and looked to his now larger family. "Whole story. Now."

"I think you should read the paper," Duke suggested.

"No," Wildwing's voice hardened. "They can stop hiding and tell me themselves." Crossing his arms, he fell into leader mode. "You're going to tell me everything and you're going to tell me now."

"Fine." Duke picked up the paper and began reading, saving Nosedive and Mallory from having to face the white drake alone. "The news of Mallory's and Nosedive's wedding is as surprising as it is welcomed. The Anaheim Gazette's own Jessica Banks sat down with the newlyweds for an exclusive interview.

"Jessica- How did you two meet? Nosedive- I was in high school and this hot babe of a recruiting officer kept trying to get me to join the military. I kept coming up with the dumbest questions just so I could see her more. Mallory- He's right, those questions were really dumb. But, he worked up the nerve to ask me out one day and I actually said yes."

"Wait a minute," Wildwing interrupted. "Lt. Pato was the recruiting officer at our school, not Mallory." This kept getting stranger and stranger. Nosedive knew it was Lt. Pato! He'd been the one to get Canard out and into the Resistance.

"Let him finish reading," Nosedive suggested.

Duke continued dramatically reading and doing his best impression of a reporter at a high-class function. "Jessica- There's, what, six years between you? That seems like an awful big gap. Mallory- It's really not that big when you think about it. Nosedive- Age doesn't mean much when you're in love.

"Jessica- How long have you two been dating? Nosedive- I'd say it's about three years now. Mallory- That's right. We started right before the invasion.

"Jessica- Isn't it a little unusual for someone in their early twenties to go out with a fifteen year old? Nosedive- Actually, you can get married at fifteen on Puckworld. Mallory- Yeah, it's a really old tradition, but ducks sometimes get married pretty young.

"Jessica- You said invasion. I've heard conflicting stories about how you and your team arrived here. How did your relationship fare during the invasion of your homeworld? Nosedive- We were separated for a long time. Thinking about Mallory was the only thing that kept me going some days. I just knew we were destined to be together and spent all of my time searching for her. Mallory- You can't imagine how relieved I was when Canard brought him on the team. It was all I could do not to kiss him right then and there. But, we're soldiers. We knew we had to put our personal feelings aside for a little while in order to bring Dragaunus down.

"Jessica- So, you broke up? Nosedive- Not exactly. Mallory- We took a short break. When we realized we were stranded on Earth, we decided to stop waiting and start dating again. Nosedive- Best decision we ever made. Mallory- Second best. Today was the best."

"Ugh," Tanya groaned. "Does this mean you two are going to be sickeningly sweet to each other now? I think I prefer the pranks."

Duke tried not to laugh and cleared his throat. Giving his still silent leader a quick glance, he returned to the story. "Jessica- We wish you both all the best. Do you have any words for your fans? Nosedive and Mallory- April Fools!"

Wildwing blinked several times, processing the last two words. Nosedive pushed his chair back, readying for a quick escape.

"April Fool?" What was that?

"You mean this has all been a joke?" Phil began laughing in relief. "Bubbies! Don't do that to me!"

"April Fool's is an Earth thing where people play pranks and jokes on each other," Tanya informed. "I remember reading about it last year when we first arrived, but forgot it was April first." She began laughing. "That was pretty good!"

"You went along with this?" Wildwing glared at Mallory. This was the sort of thing he'd expect from Nosedive but never of his weapons specialist.

"Of course!" she laughed. "He didn't get off easy. I get to keep the ring," she smirked as she tapped it. "And he had to court me for a whole month."

Wildwing's posture finally started relaxing and a hidden smile began to reveal itself. Mallory could be extremely demanding and he had no doubt that she'd truly made his brother work for this prank.

"And where were you last night?" That was one question he needed answered. Had he actually stayed with Mallory?

"In Duke's room." Nosedive looked far too pleased with himself. This had to be one of the biggest pranks he'd ever pulled and the entire team had fallen for it.

Wildwing nodded once, accepting his answer. He'd get the full story later. For now, someone needed to be put in his place.

"You," he pointed at the younger Flasblade, "Are dead."

Nosedive bolted from his chair and out the door, praying his speed would save him from the wrath of an angry brother. Wildwing followed, intent on reminding Nosedive just who was in charge.

"My money's on Wildwing," Duke bet as he refilled his coffee mug.

0000

So, what do you think? I hope you guys aren't to disappointed with my April Fool's joke! I did warn you to read carefully and that not everything was as it seemed. I also said that this tale fit into my timeline and I just don't see Nosedive and Mallory as a couple. Did anybody guess what was going to happen before it did?

This story kept me amused for about three months while I thought about, wrote, and published it. I sincerely hope you are as amused as I am. Now, on to the next grand adventure!


End file.
